asam tempoyak

Cadbury World, Birmingham

2012-01-22T21:41:00.003+08:00

First day in Notts, we didn't tour around the area instead we went to Cadbury World as suggested by Kak Rina. Kak Rina is Yanti's cousin and currently working as an intern in Notts. So, we took a train to Birm. It was a 90minutes journey. Then, from Birm we took another train to Bournville. Bournville is a small town and it exists because of Cadbury. I learned a lot from trip to Cadbury World apart from chocolate madness. Apparently, Cadbury is the first company in UK if i'm not mistaken that introduced and practised CSR. In this small town, Cadbury provided everything for their workers ; houses, school, club house, trainings, church and many more. Its amazing of how they were very concern about their workers even till now. Well, since all four of us are business students of course we are extremely excited about it. Hehe.. But the chocolate here are extremely cheap but I didn't buy any though cause I'm afraid it will melt. I just brought along free samples and some souvenier with me.

Sofiah and me

Cadbury Inn

the ticket with fancy purse of mine. =p

the factory

They have a ride in the factory. cool!

Chocolate demonstration

Cadbury World

Winter Trip - London

2012-01-22T21:20:00.000+08:00

I'm sorry for the extremely late update on my winter trip. Actually the blame is all on the internet at my apartment. Somehow, it doesn't want to cooperate with me. Well, where to start with. My winter trip was 2 weeks long including two days in Dublin before catching a flight to London. Spent 8 days in United Kingdom then another four days in beautiful Spain.

London was not really awesome for me. Its an old city, historic looking and there's too many people. Crowded and havoc. Frankly, we don't really enjoy London. I guess we are too indulge with the peacefulness of Galway. Hehe.. In London, we stayed in an apartment which quite a distance from the city. Nevertheless, it was worth it cause it was really comfy and the owner, Liz was very friendly and nice. I met my friend, Illiany at the Oxford Street. Oxford Street is a famous shopping heaven where you can find many Malaysians there. Trust me, there's too many of Malaysians! Personally, I don't think the price are cheaper unless the brand is really originate from this continent. Like for example, Long Champ brand that is amazingly famous in Malaysia now has a price difference of almost RM500 per bag. Well, you can save a lot but if to compare the price of the ticket. Hurmm, just forget about it. But the designs are different here, so I think somehow it is worth buying. There are too many things to be explored in London especially the musuems and galleries. But in term of cleanliness, its not as clean as you would imagine a Western country will look like. What I mean here, since I was young it has been installed in my mind that those countries are extremely clean but apparently it wasn't. At certain places, to some extent I felt that Malaysia is way cleaner. Owh, and one more thing about London. Halal food is easily available at a very cheap price. What I mean by cheap here is in comparison with the one that we have in Galway/Dublin. Even, if you compare relatively to Malaysian Ringgit (do not convert it) it was still cheaper.

The highlight of London trip for me is London Central Mosque. We were lost in Reagent's Park searching for the mosque and after an hour we finally made it. When we entered the mosque, it was Asr azan. And I cried. Only Allah knows, how much I miss to hear the call, to solat in jamaah in a mosque. Not to fear of anyone looking at you like you are some kind of alien. The feeling was urghh..I cant describe it with words. How I miss Malaysia at that time, because from my house I can easily listen to azan for every prayer times unlike in Galway. I have to install it in my laptop so that I can hear it. Huhu..

After performing Asr prayer, we went to St. Pancras Station to catch our train to Nottingham. To be continued...

My travel mate ; Yanti, Sofiah and Amani

We encountered a tragic accident. A couple was knocked by a van in front of us. One died

Platform in HP first movie. In King's Cross Station

St. Pancras International Station. You can catch train to Paris from here.

A visit to Imperial College of London

With Che Farhan. He's a student in Imperial. Genius.

Royal Albert Hall, walking distance from Imperial. We had an amazing tour inside it!

Train station nearest to Imperial

Then, we went to the famous Madame Tussauds

Thames River

Behind us is the HMS Belfast.

Chelsea

non-Chelsea lovers on tour. =p

London Central Mosque

Sneak-peak

2011-12-03T11:02:00.001+08:00

Cliffs of Moher

Subhanallah

beloved Pak Teh's family - Eid Adha in London

Hyde Park

Bunratty Castle

with beloved Farah in Cork

will talk about these after examination! Pray for me! ^_^

Ohana

2011-11-01T12:59:00.000+08:00

ibu and atok mak. beautiful ladies, masya allah.

always seek for their blessings to keep me strong here

I admitted I'm such a "baby", can't afford to overcome the home-sickness. Call occassionally, facetime-ing. But then, I don't feel its wrong to behave and feel homesick. After all, we are family.

Ibu, ayah, abang, angah and adik! I miss all of you!!

p/s: I have pending posts on Cliffs of Moher and Bunratty Castle. Will post it later on. Insya allah. =)

Kerinduan ini

2011-09-30T12:38:00.000+08:00

Ke hadapan ayah dan ibu yang dicintai dunia akhirat,

Maaf dah lama tidak menghantar khabar melalui e-mail mahupun meng"update" blog. Hanya sempat bertemu secara maya dan juga berbual melalui telefon. Galway sangat cantik dan baik terhadap Uda. Universiti yang lengkap dan turut mempunyai surau juga makanan halal. Pensyarah yang baik dan sangat berdedikasi. Kawan-kawan Irish juga sangat baik dan peramah. Alhamdulillah. Walaupun kadang kala sedang berjalan pulang ke rumah bersama teman, pernah juga berdepan situasi dicemuh kerana mempunyai identiti sebagai seorang Islam. Pernah Islam dihina seorang puan kerana dikatakan merendahkan perempuan. Tapi uda sabar dan menjawab dengan berhemah. Alhamdulillah, terima kasih kerana ibu dan ayah telah memberi didikan itu. Juga sedikit sebanyak ilmu dan pengalaman yang dikutip di KMB. Sangat-sangat membantu. Biarpun begitu, uda tetap bangga menjadi seorang muslim. Tika berjalan di bandar, sangat teruja jika disapa muslim dan sangat gembira jika dapat memberi salam. Rasanya masya Allah! Macam rindu sangat dengan "keadaan" yang Islam. Mendengar azan terutamanya. Rindu dekat rumah kita, sebab setiap kali masuk waktu solat mesti dapat dengar surau dan masjid macam berlawan untuk azan. Rindu. Sangat rindu. Rindu nak solat jemaah kat masjid negeri. Tapi rindu solat di rumah dengan ibu ayah uda gantikan dengan solat jemaah bersama teman rumah, Amani dan Insyi.

Dengan Kak Jihan

COKLAT

Alhamdulillah di sini ramai kawan-kawan. Senior pun sangat membantu dan turut membuat satu macam circle untuk kami. Setiap minggu kami akan berjumpa, berkongsi perasaan dan juga pengetahuan tentang Islam. Nama glamornya COKLAT tapi kalau orang biasa cakap usrah. Ohh, tapi jangan risau ini bukan sebarang kumpulan parti haluan kiri atau apa. Insya allah, uda tak termasuk dalam kumpulan sebegitu. Minta dijauhkan. Kak Jihan dan Kak Izzah sangat baik dan diorang kira macam keluarga uda dah di sini. Jumaat malam akan ada sleepover di rumah Kak Jihan untuk sedikit pengisian.

pemandangan dari bilik. Subhanallah,cerah!

dah tak cerah. ini jalan menuju Dunaras Village

Kat rumah kami masak bersama-sama. Kalau hari cerah, kami keluar berjalan-jalan di sekitar kawasan Jalan Bishop O' Donnell. Tapi hari yang cerah itu payah sangat nak dapat. Kalau dapat melihat langit yang biru, matahari yang memancar rasa nak melompat-lompat sambil cakap Subhanallah! Rindu Malaysia. Bila rindu pada Teluk Chempedak, uda melawat Teuk Galway di Salthill. Cantik ibu. Dari Salthill akan nampak sambungan yang membentuk Teluk Galway, Claire. Di situ ada Cliff of Moher yang insya Allah akan dijejaki 8 Oktober nanti bersama kumpulan COKLAT. Duduk di Galway banyak meginsafi dan menghayati betapa hebatnya ciptaan Allah. Dan betapa rasa perlu sangat bersyukur dengan apa yang dimiliki di Malaysia. Makanan terutamanya. Tak ada nak rasa makan sate terus keluar malam. Macam selalu kita pergi Sate Zul apabila terasa "malas" nak masak. Semua perlu masak sendiri sebab Galway tidak sehebat Dublin yang mempunyai pelbagai jenis restoran makanan halal. Uda berjaya buat solok lada menggunakan ikan seabass bersama Amani dan Sofia. Biarpun tidak sehebat solok lada dan tanpa nasi kerabu namun lepaslah rindu kami pada Malaysia. Bihun sup, tom yam, kari ikan salmon dan daging masak kicap. Mujur di sini ada jual kicap Habhal. Bila dah tak sempat nak masak, kami makan je nasi putih dengan telur dan kicap yang pastinya.

solok lada galway.

Tapi ibu, uda rindu asam pedas ibu. Sebab kat sini tak ada daun kesum, tak boleh nak masak. Pasti kurang rasanya. Huhu.. Rindu nak pergi pasar dengan ibu ayah. Pasar Kuantan yang walaupun serabut tapi macam-macam ada. Tidak di Galway, pasarnya terlalu canggih, tiada tawar menawar macam kita selalu buat. Hanya ada kad 10% diskaun. Pilihannya juga tidak banyak tapi yang pastinya sangat segar berbanding di pasar raya seperti Tesco, Dunnes dan juga kedai The Fisherman. Oh, pasar ini terletak di Dock, Harbour Quay. Kalau ikan salmon ( dalam gambar ada 2 ekor yang panjang tuh warna hitam ) harganya 13euro seekor. Murahlah juga secara relatifnya.

Harbour

"pasar"

Corrib River

Kalau ke bandar Galway juga tidak jauh jika dari universiti. Jadi kebiasaannya uda akan pergi ke bandar sekiranya tiada kelas pada sebelah petang. Jalan ke bandar Galway adalah melalui pintu terakhir universiti melalui Sungai Corrib. Sungai ini sebenarnya turut melalui NUIG.

Angin kuat. Sungai Corrib di belakang

Kalau nak lepas gian makan McDonalds, memandangkan di Galway tidak halal..Alternatif kami, Capital Kebab House ( macam ni kot namanya..hehe ). Sangat sedap dan hidangannya agak besar dan harganya lebih kurang macam set McDonald. Dan burgernya sangat besar sampai uda perlu menggunakan garfu dan pisau untuk memotongnya. Tidak mampu untuk makan seperti biasa kerana tidak muat ke dalam mulut.

Barang di sini secara relatifnya pun agak mahal berbanding Malaysia. Perlu tunggu Boxing Day untuk jualan hebat. Tidak seperti Sogo yang seperti sepanjang tahun melakukan jualan murah. Pilihan seluar dan baju pastinya payah untuk dicari. Perlu menunggu untuk musim sejuk tiba, pada masa itu pasti baju semua dah cukup kain. Hehe.. Seluar pula, sebagai rakyat Malaysia yang sejatinya pastinya susah mencari seluar yang sesuai dengan ketinggian. Setiap kali pergi M&S atau kedai pakaian pastinya mencari bahagian petite atau pun seluar dalam kategori SHORT. Yang lain harus mencari tukang jahit sebab mereka tidak mempunyai servis seperti di Parkson dan yang sewaktu dengannya.

Ayah dan ibu,

Uda rasa sampai di sini dahulu menulis khabar berita. Sebab internet sudah mula buat hal kerana sudah pagi di sini. Uda rindu sangat ayah ibu, abang, angah , adik , tok ki , atuk , atuk mak dan semua orang. Tapi tak apa, kejauhan ini akan menyebabkan kerinduan. Kerinduan ini akan mengukuhkan ikatan. Semoga Allah sentiasa bersama kita dalam menuju ke arah jalan kebaikan. Ayah dan ibu jaga diri. Sampaikan salam rindu kepada semua orang. Datanglah Galway bila ada kelapangan. Doakan anakmu tabah dan bertambah kekuatan di bumi Ireland ini. Bumi asing. Tapi penuh pengajaran.

Yang merindui dan mencintai ibu ayah selalu,

Khadijah Ariff

5.30 pagi,

Dunaras Village, Galway.

Galway

2011-09-22T13:12:00.001+08:00

Alhamdulillah. Lebih dari seminggu sudah berada di bumi Galway. Internet yang tidak mengizinkan di apartmen ditambah pula kekangan masa kerana sibuk dengan kelas tidak memberi kesempatan kepada.saya untuk berblog. Bandar Galway kini memasuki musim luruh. Agak sejuk dengan suhu sekitar sebelas ke lima belas darjah. ditambah pula dengan angin yang kadang kala kencang.memang menguji rakyat malaysia sejati seperti saya. Galway sebuah bandar yang sangat cantik meskipun sekarang sudah mula bewarna coklat dan merah. mempunyai kedai yang mencukupi namun tidaklah sehebat kota dublin. makanan halal juga mudah didapati termasuk di universiti. solat? alhamdulillah sangat bersyukur di universiti disediakan surau yang selesa untuk kami. jadi "atmosphere" malaysia masih terasa di sini. senior juga semua sangat membantu. warga galway juga sangat peramah. jadi setakat hari ini saya belum homesick sebab saya boleh telefon ayah dan ibu juga whatsapp dengan abang dan angah. makanan? masak di rumah dan jarang makan di luar. baru sekali makan di luar untuk jimat kos. oklah, ni update pakai hp..huhu..dah ada internet nanti akan update dengan lebih panjang berjela beserta gambar. doakan saya!

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Awesome People

2011-09-05T16:59:00.001+08:00

4th September 2011

Initially, I'm supposed to go back to KL with my brother and sister. Something came up and I decided not to follow them back to KL. Since, I haven't gone for any raya visit to my friends' house thus I agreed with Fadhilah's suggestion. Picked her up at her house then went straight to Illiany's house in Beserah. Chit chat a bit, then later on Ezzati arrived. Continue eating then went to Nadira's house at Tok Sira. Eat and eat. About 1pm headed to Arnie's house in Taman Guru. Ate delicious nasi dagang, satay and cute home-made cookies exclusively made by Arnie and her mom. Met few people there, Aresha, Jeega and the guys. Performed our Zohor prayer then around 3pm I think we went to Aishah's open house. More people there; Shadjihar, Habibah, Shafiq, Sarah, the twins, Rahimi, Elida, Elyana and the list goes on. Too many people,like seriously! Then our last stop is Ezzati's house. Ate noodles cooked by umi, very nice! Sent back Nadira and Illiany then Fadhilah. Yesterday I would say is an eating day for me but I didn't ate much because I'm the one who's driving and I'm afraid if I'm too full I can't focus on driving but on my sleepy head.

Anyway, yesterday was awesome! Full of laughters and stories. Catching up after years of not meeting up with each other (some of them). But to drive along with the girlfriends; Fadh, Yanie, Zati and Nad was indeed a fantastic experience I would say. Thank you girls for cheering up my day. Hope to see you girls next year insya Allah! And Illiany, I would say see you in London adik manis! But this eid will be much greater if only Hafizah and Afifa are here to tag along but too bad they went back to college already. Hope to see them this Saturday but still I don't put very much hope on it since everyone must be very busy. Anyhow, prayers and blessings from them are already enough for me.

Thinking of yesterday, after years away from school days; some are still the same, some change for better and some change oppositely. Some are still annoying as ever, some are still charming and sweet and some are still the chatter box. But deep in my heart, all praises go to Allah as He lead me to a better path. Perhaps if I don't enter KMB maybe I won't become like what I am today. But perhaps, if I go to somewhere else, I would become a better person. But these things are beyond our control and of course limited by our imagination. It has been written in Luh Mahfuz, your destiny. But it doesn't mean that our destiny is fixed that we don't have to work hard in life. I'm not a brainy but I know if I work extremely hard to understand something I would eventually get something in the end. What I believe is, CHANGE is a MUST. And of course we must change for better. We can't just stay in our comfort zone and believing that everything gonna be okay. And for me, one of my reason not to stay in Malaysia because I want to get out of my comfort zone. You know being a very dependent child to my parents, calling them every single day back in KMB, going back home every single weekend; sometimes when to think that I'm leaving for Ireland, I think I'm crazy. Haha, seriously! If it is the old me, for sure I would say this is a crazy thing to do. Getting out from my comfort zone, is so not me. That is why I never intended to apply for scholarship before. But someone did that for me, and here I am. Thanks to that someone. I know I'm gonna cry at the airport, I know I'm gonna cry when I listen to You Raise Me Up song, I know I'm gonna cry when I'm praying but I think all these soon-going-to-happen moments will eventually mean something very significant for me.in my LIFE. Even when I'm in KMB, I can feel that I love my family very-very much. Staying apart make our bond stronger and we even become more caring to each other.

When someone ask me, how long are you gonna stay in Ireland? I said "2.5 years there and the rest in Malaysia". Then, that someone will make weird expression and yeah I know that expression mean "she did not get a good result, is it? that's why twinning". Haha, to that someone you are absolutely wrong. I didn't get a bad result, its just not excellent BUT it is good enough to apply for full course overseas. I choose by myself to do twinning though i had the opportunity to apply for Australia/New Zealand. The thing is I want to get clinical trainings in Malaysia, get used to Malaysia's diseases and hospital's systems. That will bring a lot of benefit to me in the future, especially during the two years of housemanship. I would say, the two years of horsemanship are indeed a very critical period. Some give up medicine during their housemanship due to stress and incapability to cope with the work load that we have in Malaysia. And of course I don't want to be in that group as I am very determine to achieve what I want in my life. To be an oversea graduate won't make you special. It is just the mentality of the people that look very high upon those oversea graduates. For me, what make you special is not from where are you from but from what your heart is made up. Sincerity and passion are compulsory. And I'm praying hard to Allah that my intention to join this world will stay and I will never give up hope. I will become a fighter forever in my life. And of course in fighting the nafsu to reach the ultimate goal in life.

I think I talked too much this time. by the way, Happy Eidulfitri I wish to everyone! And I'm sorry if ever I hurt anyone of you; whether by words/expressions/gestures/acts. Its sad to leave Ramadhan, but let us pray every day to Allah that we will meet Ramadhan again next year insya Allah. =)

Flight

2011-08-28T04:02:00.000+08:00

It has been confirmed

MH 16 will fly me to Dublin via Amsterdam on following date

10 September 2011 ( Saturday )

11.55pm

Whoever have free time to see me, do come!!

I'll be in KLIA 4 hours earlier

^_^

Inspiration

2011-08-25T15:02:00.000+08:00

Hope this will be repeated in 5years time. Amin, insya Allah..=))

Thank you to Allah for everything

Thank you to my family for supporting

Thank you to my teachers for educating

Thank you to my friends for coloring

my 2 years of IB life

in KMB

p/s: this event was held on 6th August..I know,its nearly a month..=p

Random

2011-08-24T03:47:00.000+08:00

Has been browsing through iPhoto. Thanks to Syu for bringing the hard-disk. Now I can have a full collection of M09P's photos. It's a lot, like seriously. Thousands of wonderful pictures. Full of smiles and laughters. To think about it, this is the only moment in my life (so far) where I took pictures and camwhore a lot! But I don't know whether this will continues or not without them in my Ireland life soon. Huhu..

Talking about this, how I miss M09P very much. We are not the best class, full of conflicts and we are nobody(infamous people in KMB of course.haha) but yet we'll become somebody in the near time insya Allah.

Gosh. I miss you! All of you!

p/s: Syuhada and A'an, thank you for brightening another day of mine. Catching up with you guys today was very wonderful. Love you both so much! =))

Friends forever

Dunaras Village

2011-08-20T02:21:00.001+08:00

Got an e-mail from Ms Juliana of AUCMS asking us to fill up the accommodation form and make payment of 700euro (huhu,crying). And for NUIG, it will be Dunaras Village. I have to pray harder to get a very good room mate like what I had in KMB. Huhu.. But anyway, I think Dunaras Village is very beautiful. Like a hotel..=)

single en suite room

ensuite twin bedroom

living area.dining area.kitchen

Nice aren't they?

All photos taken from http://www.dunaras.ie/ApartmentInteriors.html.

Friend till Jannah

2011-08-17T20:46:00.001+08:00

It's Farahin-chan's birthday!!

Hoho.Happy birthday to you Nur Farahin Binti Ayob

Special post dedicated to you though I had "membebel" on your wall

You are my special friend

Because

With you I can be me

I can act silly without self-conscious

I can cry without feeling embarrassed

I can tell you my greatest hopes and plans with the deepest feeling of trust

I can be myself when I'm with you

Because I know you'll always accept me just the way I am

And that's why you and your friendship means so much to me.

^_^

Love.Love.Love

a good friend is like a computer! they enter your life, save u in their heart, format your problems and never delete you from their memory!

Friends forever, till jannah

Wish you all the best in your future.

Be a good muslimah, doctor, dae'i and of course daughter.

See you in Galway in October!! (hehe..dah cop awal2)

p/s: i'm not good in making beautiful words. I copied this from somewhere but they represents how I feel about our friendship.=))

Finally decided

2011-08-16T13:49:00.001+08:00

Firstly, Happy Ramadhan Mubarak to all muslims and let us cherish this holy month doing everything that we could to get the reward. Insya Allah.

Oh, and in the last post I did mentioned about confusion that I had regarding my university's choice. Alhamdulillah, it has been decided during the Graduation Day last Saturday ( will upload the pictures soon! ) and I'm going to;

National University of Ireland, Galway

After discussing with my parents about the pro's and con's together with all the options that I have, it is finally decided with blessings from them. I guess Galway will be a good place for me to study. Its not so busy like Dublin and not that expensive for the cost of living. It is located in the west-coast part of Ireland towards northern already. And there's Galway Bay. Well, somehow I think it will remind me of Kuantan (Chempedak Bay,hihi). May Allah affirm my heart with this choice and its nothing to be regretted in the future, insya Allah. The departure date as told by Miss Sheila will be somewhere around 10september onwards.

Confusion

2011-07-29T15:13:00.001+08:00

it's hard to decide, where would I be.

In Ireland

Or with families

"Dan jika Allah menimpakan sesuatu bencana kepadamu, maka tidak ada yang dapat menghilangkannya kecuali Dia. Dan jika Allah menghendaki kebaikan bagi kamu, maka tidak ada yang dapat menolak kurniaNya. Dia memberikan kebaikan kepada siapa saja yang Dia kehendaki antara hamba-hambaNya. Dia Maha Pengampun, Maha Penyayang. "

( Surah Yunus; Ayat 107 )

May Allah gives the best thing for me. I really hope I made the right choice. *praying hard*

credits to:

domo-mo.blogspot.com

photographyblogger.ne

lasoanto.deviantart.com

for those cute danbo's pictures. =)

My First Trip With Friends To Terengganu

2011-07-29T02:45:00.001+08:00

Rarely update my blog these few days as I don't really have the mood. Well, let's start with my trip to Kuala Terengganu on 15th July 2011.

Terengganu Trip - awesome

My original plan is actually to go there with my parents and we even booked for Felda Residence Hotel on 16th July. Unfortunately, the plan changed. So, I went to Terengganu with my friends; Adibah as the driver, Aan and Ain. We stopped at Mesra Mall in Kerteh and bought teacher's present there. Mesra Mall is a nice and cute shopping mall I think. Then we headed to Seberang Takir to meet with others at the homestay. Oh, before that we went to Noor Arfa Craft Complex just before K. Terengganu but there's nothing much there and they do not offer any interesting deals.

Adibah, me , Aan and Ain.

Then, we went for a tour around K.Terengganu then I followed Adibah to her grandparents' house somewhere in Bukit Kecil ( i think ). Can't really remember the name, but I do remember the way to get there. Fast forward, the next day is THE DAY!! Our beloved teacher's walimatul urus. Her house is not that far from the homestay, about 5minutes drive. Ms Nazliah is so gorgeous and I like the ceremony; simple but meaningful. Met few KMBians there plus English teachers. Photo shooting session was fun with few weird pose and actions, but it's okey. Anything for Ms Nazliah should be a no problem.

some of us. candid picture

There were 12 of us out of 20. Too bad other cannot join us. After the wedding, we checked out from the homestay and headed to Crystal Mosque.Performed tahiyatul masjid prayer but I'm quite sad as the mosque is not being fully utilised. And as what I heard from the locals, the mosque is originally build not to serve the ummah but just as any other monuments; to be visited and for you to take pictures.That is the reality there. When I entered the mosque with Aisyah we can actually count the number of people there; 3 including us. When we finished our prayer, bilal did the azan and unfortunately only 3 people step in after the iqamah; imam, bilal and another guy. It is so clear that locals don't really pray there as that mosque is quite faraway and the fact that around Losong there are many mosques and surau already.

Crystal Mosque

i love this picture

Then, we went to Belakang Airport ( actually there's a specific name but I can't recall the weird name though ) to have our tea break. It is near the seaside. We had fried squids, fish, mushrooms and prawns. Enjoying the breeze while drinking a fresh coconut plus chit-chatting with classmates, it was just awesome. Others then drove back to their hometown in Kota Bharu and Besut. Me and Dibah is the only one stayed till Sunday. And we checked in into Felda Residence Hotel. The hotel was very nice but I guess you could not compare the workmanships like those in KL. So, still the interiors are not that perfect.

some of us with food.of course.

view from Felda Residence. It is at the waterfront, just beside Pejabat Kastam.

The next morning we had a delicious and very traditional breakfast. Name it, all the local delicacies can be found and the taste is superb! Then, me and Dibah headed to Pasar Payang to buy few things like akok, jala emas and I continue my hunting for green apple baju kurung. Couldn't find a nice one in Payang, then we drove and search for it somewhere around Grand Continental Hotel. And I found a very nice baju kurung at Butik Hungga2 ( what a weird name ), spoke some Terengganu dialect and get a fantastic discount. So, it is very important to use the proper dialect especially when you visit Terengganu and Kelantan. If you use other dialect, they usually will not give you fantastic discount.

this is my all time favourite. tapioca with gula melaka!

Then, we bid a good bye to K. Terengganu and stopped over in Kemaman to buy some keropok lekor ( highly recommended! ). It was a nice journey as all of us will be scattered around after this. Some in UK, some in Ireland, India, New Zealand and Australia. Thanks to Haiqal as "tuan rumah" for showing us around and congratulations for being a university of Queensland's student finally! All the best to you! And special thanks to Dibah for being a nice driver. You've improved, at least I can sleep during the last few kilometres on the way back to Kuantan. Hehe.. May Allah bless our ukhwah forever till jannah! Like what we always dream about before..=))

Actually I want to update about another event, but I just can't help it anymore. Will continue on the next post. Perhaps. Insya Allah.

i think this is cute.as it is unreal.

Mixed Feelings

2011-07-11T11:07:00.000+08:00

It has been a while since I last updated my blog. Frankly, many sweet bitter things happened to me. And I think I might be able to share some of it with you. Mind you, I'm easy-to-forget-memories and I will only remmber important things (to my definition).

23rd June 2011

Oh, well it's a day I turned 20. Alhamdulillah, actually I never imagine I'll live up to this age. Still remember my mum always said to me that, when we were small kids we always have this age talk. My brother would say when he become 40 years old, he'll be a millionaire already ( in which I think he's only few steps away in becoming one though he's not even 30 yet! ), and my sister will say she'll become rich and buy houses and I, being only 5 years old at that time cannot imagine anything fancy except for being a dentist. Yeah, back then I always have to visit dentist at Klinik Fauziah somewhere in Wangsa Melawati. She's very nice and everytime I went there for treatement she'll give me stickers. Since then, dentist always in my list of what-I-want-to-be. Apparently I'm not heading that way. Thanks to trauma I had after my research for Intel science project in which I had to examine bad teeth plus the euwwy smell. I don't think so I can handle it and my neck couldn't stand to do the work. So, here I am choosing medicine to be my future career. Blessed with nice people in my life ( Thank you Allah! ), I'll never celebrate my birthday alone. Last year my girlfriends throw me a birthday prank. This year, though I'm alone at home, thanks to my amazing best friend Ezzati. She sent me a handmade cinnamonroll all the way from her house which is 10km away (I think). It is something like cinnabon, sweet and very nice. By the way, in my last posts, I wished for birthday cards right? And I got it!! Not only one but three!! Yeay!! It is more than what I was expected. I was expecting none actually. Thanks to my classmate, Adibah ,,beloved room mate, Farahin and my form five classmate, Aishah!! Love you guys very much!!! And the words really touched me.

from Farahin and Aishah..=)

the cinnamon roll..thank you,zati!!

the cinnabon and card from adibah.=)

and my parents gave me a huge surprise, a car. Its not a brand new car, but it is a car that my family has been using it since 1996 if I'm not mistaken and I'm the one using most of the time now. So,my parents decided to change the owner's name to my name. Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah for giving me such a great parents. And all the birthday wishes and calls from friends, I can never ask for more. And a sms from Egypt will definitely be great for my birthday. As always teasing me for being old. Okey, that's about my birthday. And my older sister apparently almost forgot my birthday, but it's okey since she's working now and I understand how easily she can forget date.

6th July 2011

Fast forward a bit. This is the important highlight I think. The day before some of my friends started to ask teachers about their results. Well, the teachers get to know one day earlier than us. Being me, I don't have the gut to ask my teachers. You know, the feeling of inferiority always inhibit me from doing so. Yes, I'm so afraid if I ask around and ended up hurting my teacher's feeling and kill their expectations on me. And actually I didn't tell any of my family members that today is the result day because I want to view it by myself without my mum beside me. But I guess, when I woke up in the morning I just can't hide the anxiousness and being a mother, my mum quickly sensed it and I was caught. It was 11am when I was reciting Yassin with my mum and brother, Pn Mawarzah texted me;

" Salam. Congrats u got 7 for Business and B for EE. Love u. Pn Mawarzah"

I was screaming and like aaaaaaa,alhamdulillah!!! Business was hard for me back then I think as I don't have time to check back my answers. And I'm glad that I meet my teacher's expectations though I did not manage to get an A for my EE but its okey. She told me that under her supervision, only 3 got B and the rest are C. So, I am satisfied enough. And that sms really kill my mood for the day, I don't even have the appetite to eat. And my mum brought me for a facial treatment + spa. Haha, my mum is cute right? The thing is, when it is the time for the result to be out we are not at home yet. My family are having dinner at KLCC and had a chit-chat session with my brother's friend. So, as I cannot wait anymore I decided to view the result using my mum's iphone. My phone could not reach the same website as it requires username and what not. Alhamdulillah, I met the requirement of 36 excluded bonus point and I got 2 extra points. So, total of 38 points. The highest achievement in my IB life. All this while the highest point I got is 33 and I'm so inferior and not confident of myseld whether I'll survive IB or not. Thanks to Allah for listening to my prayers and especially my parents and grandparents who did solat hajat for me everyday. Support from teachers, friends and family are the one that keep me moving and not giving up hope. My parents are speechless because they are extremely happy as I had many difficulties throughout the two years of IB. Being an asthamatic patient ( new in the list ), there are many things that I am allergic to and I cannot do. So, I ended up going back home every single weekend without fail. Thanks to my big brother, for the patience to drive me and pick me up at KMB. And when I'm at home, I rarely study because most of the time I'll be sleeping to get recover. I guess Allah knows the best for me and He help me along the way, guiding me through his beautiful verses. So, my next destination is yet to be determined. Whether it will be Ireland or Malaysia. It depends on my health status and other things to be considered. Its a tough decision to be made! Really tough ones.

7th July 2011

Did I ever told you that I still have a great-grandfather? I lost my grandfather when I was 12 years old. And sadly, I lost my great-grandfather when I am 20 years old. He suffered peptic ulcer and was admitted to ICU for about nine days I think. That is why, I could not update my blog because we always travelled back to Muar to visit him. He was a strong guy, went for two operations but being a 92 years old he could stand and recover. I remembered everytime we visited him, ayah will whisper to him the word Allah. And amazingly his heart beat will increase everytime the word Allah is whispered to his ears. I really adore him because as 92 years old, he is really tough. He does not suffer any disease nor memory loss. He still can remember his great grandchildren's name and even his great-great-grandchildren. When he was healthy, he still can drive in Muar. May his soul blessed by Allah and may I'll see him in Jannah.

This a few of things happened to me. There are many but I think this will be the only piece of it that I would like to share. To think of it, our life is all planned by Allah. We can only work hard for it and pray hard to Allah and the outcome of it can only be decided by Him. Like in my great grandfather's case, apparently he actually getting better after the operations. But I guess Allah love him more, Alllah called him back. And for my IB, I'm not a genius but I know if I keep working and believing Allah will grant me something bigger than I ever tought of. Even my friends who worked really hard but did not achieve their target, but they won something even bigger. It is the love to Allah. They accepted what Allah gave them with an open heart and they can still keep smiling. I think it is more meaningful for them, for everyone of us. Faith is what we need to have.

And talking about current thing that happened in Malaysia. For me, everything that encounter to our mind, things that we see and hear we must justify it first. I mean we could not make one-sided judgement. Everything has the negative and positive sides of it and we could not pour in all our emotions into it as you'll not be seen as a wise person but rather emotionally unstable. The choice of words also sometimes I think was too harsh as if you are not someone who are educated like you always bragged about. The right words if used with the right intonation and right expression will give the greatest impact of all. Words spoken comes with great responsibility. If you are not an expert at something, shut your mouth but open your mind and dig for more information about it.

I think that is all that I want to share. It is all about opinion and respect. Listen to others and argue intellectually. If you disagree with me, I'm so sorry. This is just an opinion. Till then, take care! =)

Ganjaran

2011-06-22T21:09:00.000+08:00

Okey, ni ada satu cerita nak kongsi bersama. Dengar dekat IKIM.fm tadi.

Ceritanya macam ni;

Ada seorang tukang kayu yang sangat mahir dalam pertukangan dan ukiran.

Dia telah bekerja selama 20 tahun dan mengambil keputusan untuk berhenti bekerja dan dia telah menyuarakan hasratnya kepada majikannya. Dan majikannya telah pun bersetuju. Hari-hari yang terakhir tukang kayu itu menghabiskan masanya dengan membayangkan dirinya pergi bercuti di tepi pantai yang sangat indah.

Sedang dia asyik berangan, majikannya berjumpa dengannya dan berkata;

"Sebelum kau pergi, aku sangat ingin meminta pertolonganmu untuk membina sebuah lagi rumah"

Tukang kayu itu merasa berbelah bahagi memandangkan dia banyak terhutang budi dengan majikannya dan majikannya juga merupakan kawannya sendiri. Namun dia juga tidak sabar untuk pergi bercuti.Akhirnya tukang kayu itu bersetuju juga untuk membina rumah tersebut. Tetapi dilakukannya secara sambil lewa memandangkan dia memikirkan projek tersebut adalah bukan untuk kepentingan dirinya sendiri.

Setelah siap dibina, tukang kayu itu dengan segera menemui majikannya untuk menyerahkan kunci rumah tersebut.

Lalu majikannya berkata;

"Engkau simpan sahajalah kunci rumah ini kerana ini merupakan hadiah aku kepada engkau. Sebagai menghargai kerjamu yang bagus sepanjang 20 tahun engkau bekerja denganku."

Alangkah terkejutnya tukang kayu tersebut dan dia merasa sangat malu kerana reputasinya yang sangat baik selama 20 tahun diakhiri dengan kerja yang sambil lewa. Sekiranya dia mengetahui terlebih dahulu, pasti dia akan membina rumah itu dengan ukiran yang terbaik. Namun penyeselan tiada berguna, dan tinggallah tukang kayu itu di dalam rumah yang banyak kekurangannya itu atas sikapnya yang mementingkan diri.

Pengajarannya di sini:

Kita sebagai hamba Allah, walau apa jua pekerjaan yang kita lakukan sebenarnya adalah untuk diri kita sendiri. Janglah melakukan sesuatu benda dengan rasa terpaksa kerana diri sendiri yang akan terseksa. Analoginya mudah di sini untuk kita kaitkan dengan ibadah kita kepada Allah. Secara logiknya, adakah kuasa Allah akan berkurang kalau kita tak beribadah kepadaNya? Tidak sama sekali kan? Jadi kenapa Allah sangat -sangat tekankan suruh kita solat semua? Sebab untuk kebaikan kita sendiri. Semua orang nak masuk syurga bukan? Biar lekeh mana pun orang tuh, biar jahat macam mana pun mesti ada sekelumit rasa ingin ke syurga itu bukan. Jadi, sebab itu kita kena beribadah sungguh-sungguh supaya kita semua dapat menikmati nikmat syurga diakhirnya dan yang paling penting dapat bertemu dengan Allah dalam keadaan yang terbaik. Kalau kita tak ikhlas, nanti sia-sia je kan. Nanti "rumah" kita kat akhirat nanti tak tahulah cantik ke tak kan. Ikhlas memang payah, tapi selagi kita mencari alasan dan tidak memberi ruang kepada diri untuk berusaha beribadah dengan sebaik mungkin sampai bila kita tidak akan jumpa ikhlas itu. Ayuh, sama-sama kita betulkan diri kita dan berusaha menjadi abid yang sebenarnya!

maaf saya bukan ahli agama yang sangat arif tentang sesuatu perkara. Apa yang saya faham adalah sangatlah basic dan ini adalah interpretasi saya. Maaf atas segala kekhilafan dari diri yang tidak sempurna ini. Insya allah akan menambahkan lebih banyak ilmu agar ulasan lebih bernas. =)

Jealousy?

2011-06-21T23:49:00.001+08:00

Someone insisted on transferring this picture via yahoo.

This steak serve for a person

And I think it is not for human. Perhaps some kind of koala monster

This is enough to feed me for a day I guess. Isk2

Jealous?

Sorry, I just had my salmon with lemon butter sauce last Friday

^_^

p/s: this post specially made for someone. Do ignore this.

Eclipse

2011-06-16T13:20:00.000+08:00

It was raining last night. Its so cold outside and we ( dad, mum and me ) went out of the house to witness by ourselves the moon eclipse. Unfortunately it cannot be seen in Kuantan, as it has been raining since evening. Since we're out of home at 2 in the morning, so we decided to have a drink at Taj before headed to Masjid Negeri for solat sunat gerhana bulan. Not many people though as expected. Prayers started at 3.45am and after the prayers, there was khutbah. It was an experience for me as I never did solat sunat gerhana as jemaah at the mosque. This eclipse actually make my belief stronger that Allah is The Mighty One and The Creator. We human, is so weak. We are nothing without Allah. So, be grateful and be a good abid!

i wish

2011-06-15T08:57:00.002+08:00

i have been cleaning my room for the pas few weeks. its hard to get rid of things,haihh..Well,some of the clothes,tudung and bags are packed nicely for donation. Some of the childhood novels like Enid Blyton series, Lion Boy etc packed into boxes to be sent to nearby library. I even still have my primary school stuffs in my room. No wonder I could not fit in all my KMB stuffs. Haha. I guess I'm that type of person who loves to keep things as I can easily forget memories. So, at least when I see these stuffs, they can refresh my memories back. Oh, and I even found out a box full of cards ( birthday, eidul fitri, thank you, goodluck etc. )!! Extremely excited. Well, back then everyone does not has a hand phone and still use the conventional method to send cards especially back then when Hari Raya fall in December during the long school holiday. And I still prefer those cards, its more meaningful as those messages especially during pagi raya usually will be deleted straight away by me. You don't expect me to save it and consume the phone memory. I'm not using iPhone anyway. So, in conclusion. I would be very glad if in my upcoming birthday ( few days to go ) someone would happily send me a birthday card. I know this is a demanding wish but heee, who knows someone will turn up and be very nice to me on my birthday by sending a card. Don't worry, I'll keep all the cards and I have been doing it since I'm 10 years old so perhaps I shall celebrate my 10-years-of-keeping-cards by having you to send me one. Oh,my..I have few days left for the last teen. Hahaha.. But it just a number right? What matters is your good deed is it enough or not. A year older, means we are short of another year to live in this world. Till then, wassalam!

p/s: this is the address, I really hope for at least one card. =)

Khadijah Ariff
18, Jalan AU1A/3D
Taman Keramat Permai
54200 Kuala Lumpur

Sorry, I could not give my Kuantan address for some safety reason. For those who knows my house, I guess you just can drop into my postbox right? And those who know my Kuantan address, you can send it to the that address. No problem..=)

travel.travel

2011-06-14T08:39:00.001+08:00

Ever since I came back from BTN, I have been travelling every weekend and then. Two weeks to Johor and Malacca, last week and this coming weekend will be in KL and Jengka. Basically I just love travelling though it is a bit tiring but as for me as long as I get to be with my family then its okey. Now, only me the one left at home. My brother is working in KL. My elder sister starts her chambering already, she's a lawyer. And my youngest sister stay in hostel. Its a bit lonely because all I get to do everyday is cleaning the house, watch DVDs and read books.And I'm that kind of person who like to think more than I should who will freak out if ever I heard any unwanted voice. But sometimes I guess that sound only play in my brain only. And I'll end up switching on most of the lights where I am sitting and will tune on to radio and tv at the same time. Just to get myself occupied ans accompanied. Freaky is it? But then when I think about it back, there's nothing to be afraid of because Allah is always with me right? He always watching me and protect me. So, I guess I'll have more courage from now on. Well, luckily last week I had some social activities; spent a day in Ezzati's house and an evening walk with Fadhilah at Taman Bandar. Next week I'm planning to see Aan in KL. I think I have something to share but I barely remember it now. Anyway, in the next post I'll share some knowledge from my readings.

p/s: everyone, please pray for my Biology teacher, Mr Guna who was admitted to ICU in Putrajaya due to some complications. Though he only taught me for few months but he is really a good teacher. He really teach. Hope he will get through it.

sigh

2011-06-08T15:14:00.000+08:00

Huarghhhh, its only 2 weeks plus and I'm bored already. Perhaps being an IB student for 2 years make me so used to the word busy and lack of sleep. Usually i'll have the dark circle under my eyes purely because of 3 hours of sleep but I think I'm having it now due to too much of sleep I guess. Sleep at 10pm almost every day? I think it was like this when I'm in lower form I think. But yes, it feels good to finally be at home.
Back in hometown, almost all of my secondary school friends are on hiatus also.
Yeah, long holiday till September.
People have been calling me for some hang-out and gathering but none I turn up to.
Perhaps I'm not ready yet. Ready for what?
Basically I still couldn't answer questions like; "Where are you going to do your degree?"or " When is your flight?". These are few questions that I still couldn't answer it.
As I'm still have the dilemma whether to stay in Malaysia or go for overseas.
I know its still too early to say about it as result is not out yet but indeed I must have something in my mind. The decision. Final one.
Ya Allah, please help me in making decision, the best one for me.

oh, btw!
BTN is not that bad. Just regard it as an informative camp about your country.
Well, I learned a lot about Malaysia and my rights as a Malay.
And yes, I'm proud to be a Malay!
Another thing, the test is the easiest test I would say.
It took me only 15minutes. Its just common sense and a bit of history. Thats it.
Till then,enjoy your holiday!

p/s: I love holiday because I can read books, a lot of it! Finishing sirah of Rasulullah. Its a high time to refresh about it I think..=)

It will never end, it will stay forever in my heart.

2011-05-22T15:27:00.000+08:00

Finally, I finished my two years as an IB student.

Upon finishing the last paper, Business and Management everyone shouted with all of their heart.

But. I couldn't do it. I cried instead.

How can people regard these two years as their suffering moments?

IB is hard. I admit that.

IB is challenging. Absolutely.

But IB has given me so much opportunities to learn more about this world.

IB is awesome. No doubt about that.

But what make IB awesome for me is because I studied in KMB.

KMB......

Fantastic room mate! five stars for Farahin Ayob! yeay!

The teachers are great!

Awesome friends!

Friendly and supportive staffs!

The school environment always make me feel young..=p

It has been two fantastic years for me.

With tears and joy but more sweet moments as for me.

Critical thinking is indeed a must here and IB&KMB widened my perspective about life.

About ISLAM. this is the most important highlight here.

How I wish to go to Ireland.

Not just because I want to study medicine there and be a great muslimah doctor.

But another thing is I want to stay in that sisterhood and circle of friends

That will always remind me of Allah, show me the beautiful of Islam

And help me out to know more about Islam

Yes, Allah is with us no matter where we are. I admit that.

But I need these awesome people to help me go through this journey.

As I'm not strong enough yet to stand on my own feet.

To know who you are is to look at who your friends are

I need these friends,so badly..

Oh, Allah! please grant my wishes and hopes.

Tomorrow I'm going for BTN in Tanjung Rhu, Sepang.

It is near the beach. So, I probably not going to see people for a month.

Why? Haha..because I know I will get "tanned" there.

One more thing about two years in KMB.

It turned me into brown version of Khadijah.

Well, guess its gonna take months to recover back

Definitely I'm not missing KMB whole year summer season. Hee..=)

Allah Knows

2011-04-30T16:25:00.000+08:00

This week has been one unforgettable week ever in my life.
I lose all my things because somebody broke into our house just before my parents+sister+brother are about to depart for umrah.
It was sad. I am really sad.
Yes.Macbook,handphones, mp4, digicam, IB books and notes and my personal documents all gone.
Luckily my uncle, Pak Lang and ayah's friend, Uncle Azman helped me out
Managed to settle only on the police report and my IC.
Then quickly took the evening flight to KLIA
And my cousins picked me up at 9pm then we had a dinner
I was exhausted when I reached D122
But! I saw something more interesting
It was a postcard from Ireland!! Sent by super-senior!
I was so excited and it made my day. It gives me inspiration.
And the following days were great for me
So many surprises; cupcakes, lollipops,photostatted BMS notes and special gift from Ms Nazliah
The words, " I love you more than you know" really touch me
I feel that Allah is soothing my feeling with so many cute things!
Though I am really sad because I am property-less
But all these things made me realize that I am still rich
Rich with love
From family members, friends and teachers!
And of course Allah loves me!! He gave me all these great things in my life!
Alhamdulillah!
There's nothing more that I can ask from You, Allah
Because you knows what the best for me
MacBook will never cheer me up as these awesome people will do
Thank you Allah, thank you very much, thank you.
I owe you. I must be a great abid and khalifah and I'm working hard on it.
And I know You will help me to go through it
Final exam is next Wednesday
Please pray for my success
Thanks to my family, friends and teachers
You guys are fantastic!
May Allah will always bless all of you..=))

p/s: friends, do drop me your number at my e-mail ( khad.ariff@gmail.com ) because I don't use phone currently. will have one perhaps after IB finish, in 3weeks time. thanks!

2011-04-25T14:41:00.001+08:00

i was in Kuantan for a day.
few matters need to be settled.
my mock exam was considered okey except for my chemistry.
i screwed up my paper one because i took clarinase and slept.
should never repeat that mistake no matter how painful it is.
and yeah, i escaped my irp session for one day and a half.
will be coming back tomorrow.
oh my, now i can say my final is next Wednesday!!!
Harhar...weird feeling though
Will be leaving KMB in a month..Huhu..=((
That's all.
My family members will be leaving for umrah tomorrow.
Lets pray for their safety and health.
And I'm going to fight here alone in Malaysia against IB!
But I'll never afraid of it.
I know, because Allah will always be with me. =))

Down

2011-04-19T14:57:00.000+08:00

I went to Shah Alam last Sunday.
Saw a go-cart arena.
"Pergi Tak Kembali-Rabbani" suddenly played in the car
Tears rolling down my cheeks
Abang said, "Its almost a year already right?"
I miss you so much
IB is finishing and I can't afford not to miss you
May Allah always be with you
And may Allah give me the strength to always improve myself
At least as great as you
But I hope for way better

Thanks,abang for comforting me back. Yes, the probability of death is one.
We don't know how many days left for us.
Keep working and praying hard.
Do your best in everything as if you're going to die tomorrow.
And yes, I'll give my very best for IB exam.

I miss my parents so much. I really need their words during this hard time. =(
Oh,Allah.Give me strength.

14 days left to IB

Moments To Be Treasured

2011-04-15T18:41:00.001+08:00

Wawasan bridge and Putrajaya cruise

Lovely girlfriends with Teacher Nazliah

Boys are like that. Immature

meet my new bf,Irfan!

Date: 3rd April 2011
Venue: somewhere near Monumen Alaf Baru, Putrajaya
Awesome people: Teacher Nazliah and classmates!

Its a quick update. It was a great outing as a class.
Wonder when will we have this moment again.
Hope that we will have this chance again before everyone fly off to selected destinations.
Friends, barely it is less than a month left for us to share.
Experiences, beautiful moments, laughters, joy, tears, fights, crisis and many more.
Islam taught me about ukhwah, not just about friendship that will not last long.
And I'll never regret this two painful yet fun years in KMB.
As it is full of colours that teach me to see the world
In more colorful ways with awesome people like you.
May Allah will always bless our ukhwah.
And like I said before, kita sahabat selamanya. Till in jannah.
We'll see each other in His jannah. Insya allah. =)

And He has united their hearts ( the believers ).

If you had spent all that is in the earth, you could not united their hearts.

But Allah has united them. Certainly, He is the All Mighty, All Wise.

(Al-Anfal:63)

Days left to IB: 19 DAYS

Give me strength

2011-04-07T13:25:00.000+08:00

Well, 26 days to go. It gonna be here soon. I can feel the tense and stress now.
I miss home badly though I went back almost every weekend, well including this weekend too.
It just that I need some space of escapism. Out of IB world for a moment.
Though I'm still revising at home, but the feeling is different.
You don't feel like crying. Trust me.
I did cried yesterday, first time ever in my life as an IB student.
Kak Azleen once asked me before, have I cried?
I asked is it a must?
And she said, well it's a norm.
Now I can understand.
But then, Allah is here for me!
So, friends!
Wherever you are, when you feel so stressful
Wake up for qiam!
Go for a date with Allah! Spend at least 30minutes with Him!
You have been forgetting Him all day long but He continuously watching you.
Giving you the strength from up there. Give you all the nikmat. Even the oxygen you're breathing now.
And be patient! Work hard and pray hard! He will surely grant you something BIG at the end of the day.

I'm telling myself to stay strong.
I can't tell my parents
Or else they will never let me see Ireland
I'm not that "adik" anymore
I can stand alone as Allah will always be with me..^_^

Friends,
If ever you come across me
Please tell me that I'm going to be okay
That I'm going to finish the race
That I'm going to be a winner
Most importantly
Remind me that Allah is always with me!

"But if they turned away, Say: Allah sufficient for me: none has the right to be worshipped but He In Him I put my trust and He is the Lord of the Mighty Throne" ( At-Taubah: 129 )

A reminder

2011-03-26T02:06:00.000+08:00

Demi Tuhanmu,Allah bersabarlah!
Only few days to go.
Keep struggling.
Focus.Focus.Focus.
Penat?
Siapa lagi penat?
Ibu ayah yang tak putus-putus cari rezeki&doa+solat hajat untuk anak?
Cikgu yang mengajar walaupun soalan2 macam tak study ditanya?
Khadijah awak punya penat tak seberapa pun
Stop whining and continue working
Pause.

Here It Is Now

2011-03-19T17:48:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow I'm going back to KMB already. Huhu.. And the war officially begin tomorrow. Well, less time will be spent on internet and phones of course. My free time will be for important things like ad-deen, family and health.

So, friends I'm really sorry if I don't have time to reply your messages and calls. Kadang rasa diri ini sangat mementingkan diri tapi fahamlah teman, saya perlu fokus untuk exam ni. Insya allah, we will meet after everything settle down.

Afifa called me last night and asked for my details and I asked her for what purpose she want all those info?
And she said, "Hehe,nak isi borang mara lah"
I was like, " Err, apakah? Sejak bila lak borang MARA ada benda camnih?"
"Ada ruangan untuk details 2 orang sahabat karib dan saya pilih awak dan Hafizah"

khadijah.afifa.hafizah

gambar ni sangat old school. but i miss that moment!

Afifa!! Saya sangatlah terharu sampai menitik air mata. Terima kasih sebab anggap saya kawan baik awak. Borang MARA untuk ke France tuh! Awak, saya pun minta maaf sebab sibuk sangat dan jarang sangat kita dapat jumpa. The last time three of us met is at Aishah's house last raya. Rindu korang sangat-sangat! Harapnya kita akan dipertemukan oleh Allah sabtu nanti, insya allah kalau tak ada aral melintang. Awak buat elok-elok final exam hari Isnin nanti. Saya tahu awak boleh punya!

Rindunya masa sekolah dulu! Teringat kita study setiap petang sama-sama. Fifa ajar Fizik, Hafizah ajar Chem/Maths dan saya dengan lukisan2 Bio.. Teringat kita berlatih nak pergi interview MARA sampai malam sama-sama, buat cupcakes.. Aaaa,rindu korang!! Rasa nak peluk korang sangat-sangat sekarang ni! Yelah, saya pun dah nak final.. Kadang rindu sangat masa kita bersama sebab tak jumpa lagi orang cam korang kat kmb, tapi yelah haluannya lain-lain. Jadi, jom kita berusaha sama-sama untuk capai impian kita!

gambar ni lama gila & x secomel skrg, tapi good luck jgk!

Jadi SITI NUR AFIFA!! CHAIYOK2!! Saya & Hafizah akan sentiasa doakan kejayaan untuk awak. Semoga bumi Perancis akan awak takluki tahun ni. =)

p/s: sila abaikan gambar zaman muda ini. iye, sangat lain..=p

2011-03-13T17:08:00.000+08:00

Had opor daging today!
It was really delicious..^_^
Accompanied my youngest sister for her practice
She's in archery team for her school (wow! clap2)
To see her shooting for the bull's eye
I had this feeling
Wow,she's that great
May Allah will always guide her
To reach success in any path that she goes
Be a good muslimah, a great hafizah
Sometimes, I feel my time left in this world
Is very little
Will I have the time to reach dreams that I have?
Will all my sins be forgiven by Allah by the time I die?
Well, as I'm still alive
I must work things out to my best
Whether as a Muslim
as a daughter or
as an IB student..Insya Allah

Home sweet home

2011-03-12T10:43:00.000+08:00

Back in Kuantan for few days till Tuesday
Just had my nasi kerabu just now
Has been craving for it for months!
How I miss home badly
Its like two different world
In KMB,the weather is melting me away
But in Kuantan, specifically Indera Mahkota
Cold and you wake up early in the morning
Your window panels are condensed with morning mists
Now you know
The reason for this acne-full face
Weather-intolerance syndrome.

78

2011-03-08T19:59:00.000+08:00

Counting days to final exam
At the same time counting days to go back home
I'm going back to Kuantan this Friday!
Can't wait for that..Ngee
It has been tiring weeks full of tests and quizzes.
Guess I need a break to gasp for air
Then back to work.
Ezzati, don't forget our date next Monday,insya allah! =)

p/s: I jogged for 15minutes of 5km distance.sigh,need to improve on that.

82

2011-03-04T18:22:00.000+08:00

Emotional breakdown and tears rolling down after a long time.

As I go through this pieces journey of my life

I found out some of us are being dehumanized

Don't get the idea?

Well, basically.....

Some people just want to be friend with others with purposes

When people dehumanized

Let go of humanity inside

They don't care for others and are not sensible anymore

And I agree to one point

To build an ukhwah we need faith as the base

Faith?

Lillahitaala. full stop.

Life is not easy but i believe with all the promise from Allah.

Memang susah untuk berlapang dada

Tapi jangan pernah berputus asa sebab Islam tidak mengajar umatnya menjadi lemah..^_^

84

2011-03-02T14:28:00.000+08:00

.evil face.

.the hearts.

.last practical as an IB student.doctors wanna be. insya allah..=)

85

2011-03-01T02:09:00.000+08:00

Subjects around KMB. My latest shot and now I realize how much I love macro mood.

The natural lighting for the yellow flower, isn't it awesome? Subhanallah!

86

2011-02-28T18:21:00.000+08:00

Maths is improving.

I think I can make 7 a reality in 64 days time.

Oh Allah,please give me the strength

I really need it

88

2011-02-26T18:59:00.001+08:00

All done ( attended pre-marriage course with no specific guy in mind to be my husband..=p )
66 days left
Must study VERY HARD

though not much time left, still have time to do crazy things. do ignore this crazy picture. i'm making a photo album, my last few days in MCB. It will be something to be remembered. How I spend my few days left with friends.

p/s: thanks to Allah for blessing me with a mother that gave me "epal besi". it save me from being murdered by IB. Or else, I do not know how I'm gonna submit my EE and TOK without having any back up. see, Allah itu Maha Mengetahui dan Maha Penyayang. What more can i say,subhanallah.

Ini Ujiannya

2011-02-12T17:31:00.000+08:00

Alhamdulillah, baru sahaja recover daripada dua minggu yang dipenuhi demam,selsema,batuk dan yang sama waktu dengannya. Beberapa hari yang lepas memang kemuncaknyalah, dan disebabkan badan tak mampu nak berjuang sendirian terpaksa meminta pertolongan si ubat dan si alat. Oh, Khadijah memang tak suka makan ubat sebab suka nak challenge my own antibody to overcome it. Lagipun, bila sendiri nih kita belajar bersabar. Hadis mengatakan

"Bersabarlah dalam menghadapi penyakit. Sesungguhnya penyakit itu penghapus dosa"

Dalam interpretasi saya, penyakit itu penghapus dosa tapi dengan syarat kita bersabar dan meminta pertolongan dari Allah.

Pertolongan?

Macam konsep fikir dan zikir.

Usaha mesti seiring dengan doa,betul tak? Fikir di sini kita boleh kaitkan dengan usaha kita untuk membaikkan penyakit kita. Misalnya minum air sebanyak 3liter sehari, banyak kan? Takpun jangan makan ais-krim yang sememangnya dalam saya punya senarai mesti beli setiap minggu. Zikir pula kita boleh kaitkan dengan doa kita kepada Allah. Dalam solat kenalah mohon dengan Allah, agar diampunkan dosa kita dan agar diberikan kesabaran untuk menghadapi penyakit kita dan semestinya memohon agar penyakit kita disembuhkan. Fikir dan zikir diiringi dengan keikhlasan akan membawa kepada hasil yang sangatlah menakjubkan. Allah kan suka mendengar rintihan hambaNya, doa hambaNya yang tidak putus-putus meminta kepadaNya. Teringat kepada kisah yang dikongsi oleh hamba Allah yang ditampal di Hot Board. Sweet gila kan kisah tuh? (kawan-kawan KMB ada baca tak?).

Cakap pasal usaha dan ikhtiar ini. Terima kasih kepada abang saya yang terhebat, Muhammad Firdaus! Terima kasih kerana meluangkan separuh harimu untuk adik, bawa pergi klinik dekat bandar baru bangi. Dan sangat gembira walaupun dalam kesakitan, sebab dapat berjumpa atuk dengan tok ki dekat rumah mak cik Hamisah. Dah lama sangat tak jumpa,sangat gembira. Sangat berselera makan walaupun hanya nasi putih+kicap+sayur goreng+telur goreng tapi sebab bersama ahli keluarga,semuanya indah belaka. Terima kasih ya Allah, atas nikmat keluarga yang sangat sempurna yang telah kau pinjamkan kepadaku. Rahmatilah kami ya Allah, lindungilah kami ya Allah dan tempatkanlah kami bersama-sama di syurga nanti. Amin..=)

Dan semalam, doktor telah mencadangkan agar mengambil nebulizer. Oh,sahabat baik saya!

Nebulizer adalah untuk pesakit-pesakit asma. Ini alternatif lain selain daripada inhaler dan adalah lebih sesuai untuk orang yang bukan selalu kena asma. Tak selalu ke? Tak, saya selalu kena bronchospasm. Ini adalah keadaan di mana bila ada allergen dan menyebabkan pengecutan dinding bronchioles secara mengejut dan ini akan menyebabkan kesukaran bernafas. Allergen yang telah dapat dikenal pasti setakat ini adalah habuk, makanan laut ,perubahan cuaca yang drastik dan juga anak-beranak tembikai (timun,honeydew etc.).

Jadi rakan-rakan janganlah kecil hati kalau saya tak nak minum air tembikai yang sememangnya kegemaran rakan-rakan di KMB. It was once my favorite. Sedih betul tapinya kan banyak benda lain boleh makan/minum. Jadi, tak kisahlah. Dan sekarang on medication, Ventolin bagi melegakan pernafasan.

Bila fikirkan, mampukah saya untuk survive kalau pergi luar negara? Semalam pun mengharapkan abang sebab klinik terdekat dengan KMB macam tak boleh diharapkan. Dan teringat dulu sebelum pergi vacation dengan family, ada kena juga macam ni. Masa tuh menangis-nangis tahan sakit. Nasib ibu dan ayah ada untuk tenangkan dan bawa pergi klinik. Okey,saya mengaku saya memang manja dengan keluarga saya dan saya perlukan lebih banyak kekuatan. Ya Allah, berikanlah yang terbaik untuk hambaMu ini.

Tapi setiap kali diserang asma sehingga tidak boleh bernafas. Saat itu merasakan diri ini akan dijemput Tuhan tapi Allah masih lagi memberikan diri peluang untuk bernafas di bumiNya. Untuk apa? Agar diri ini mengambil kesempatan yang singkat ini untuk beribadat kepadaNya, memperbaiki diri, perteguhkan iman dan mengelokkan akhlak agar dapat menjadi penghuni syurga di hujung nanti. Jauh di sudut hati, sangat bersyukur kerana diberikan peringatan sebegini rupa dari Allah. Walaupun amat sakit terutama bila waktu malam saat tak mampu meminta pertolongan orang lain, rasa helpless yang teramat sangat. Tapi hanya Allah yang dapat membantu, berdoa kepadaNya dan memohon ampunanNya dan kerana Allah itu Maha Pengasih Dia meringankan bebanan itu. Itu satu peringatan untukku, mati itu menghampiri setiap kali jantung ini berdegup. Ini mungkin degupan terakhir dalam hidupku. Kawan-kawan, ayuh kita mencari cinta Allah! Mati itu suatu yang pasti, marilah berusaha untuk suatu perkara yang sangat-sangat pasti. Betul tak? Tapi itu tak bermakna kita perlu sambil lewa dalam mengerjakan perkara yang duniawi ini sebab dunia ini adalah jambatan untuk ke akhirat. Dalam belajar pun, kenalah ikhlas dan bersungguh-sungguh sebab Allah kan memandang kepada usaha kita dan insya allah ada ganjaran di hujungnya.

p/s: meningatkan diri, IB ini bukan suatu yang pasti pun. adakah kita akan sempat mengambil kertas pertama 4 Mei nanti? 80 hari yang tinggal mungkin 80 hari terakhir kita di dunia ini. Wallahualam.

in the glimpse of time

2011-02-03T00:44:00.000+08:00

Back at home in Kuantan for few hours before going back to beloved kampung in Pagoh early in the morning. Plane just now landed quite smooth and with temperature of 24 degree, I could feel the coldness ( it was raining ). Yeah, it is chinese new year and of course my house is attacked by fireworks tonight. Uncle, happy celebrating! Though only for few hours, the feeling of lying down on your own comfy bed is an indescribable feeling. With few things left to be done in IB,

~~TOK essay~~
EE
~~Mathurat kubra~~
Individual Oral Presentation - the first one this Monday!
IRP notes
preparation for IB, 3rd May 2011

The plagiarism rate was indeed low for both, at 10% with most of it involving the footnotes and common sentences. So, insya allah for now I can say that my mind is calmer now. No editing, no drafting, no consulting and no sleepless nights. Now, can focus on my preparation for IB exam. O Allah, please give me the strength dan kerajinan untuk study itu..=)

When I'm thinking about my friends' situation in Egypt now, I ask myself, "Do I really want to go overseas? What if I encounter such situation? Will I survive? "

Yeah, I'm that type of person yang fikir terlebih banyak but then it's true right. However, just believe in Allah and have faith in Islam, you'll be save dunia and akhirat. Amin

Kejar Sana Sini

2011-01-18T03:03:00.000+08:00

Bulan ini bulan main kejar-kejar dengan EE dan TOK.
Bulan depan main kejar-kejar dengan oral pula.
Bulan lagi satu main kejar-kejar dengan IRP mates.
Oh,indahnya I'mBusy.

Tapi jangan lupa Allah, kerana siapa kita untuk cakap kita sibuk untuk Allah?

p/s: Alhamdulillah, banyak perkara yang hebat berlaku pada saya. Moga nikmat yang diberikan tidak menjauhkan saya dari rahmat Allah.

I Miss You!

2010-12-30T21:34:00.000+08:00

Gonna be 20 next year, so fast aite? It has been almost 3years I left secondary school and I'm missing those people :

Ahla Najwa! ( don't ask me why tapi ko asyik muncul dalam mimpi aku..mungkin Moscow next holiday destination..haha )
Nur Azirah Zakaria - dekat tapi jauh
Sakinah Hassan
Nur Hafizah Alwi - dah lama awak tak mesej saya kan? =(
Afifa
Adilah Zulkifly - dah lama tak jumpa kan?
Husna Tawpik
Jessica
Nadiah Nadzirah - hopefully we will meet up this January!
Illiany Hamdan
5SA classmates!!
Stalker jauh, K.O.A.L.A ( baca blog tak pernah tinggal kesan kan, tapi saya tahu..=p )
and the list goes on

How I miss school days. Jealous tengok junior ( espc Asifa ) bersuka ria.. But then, life must goes on. Let the past become a memory and future become a victory. Reminding myself too..=)

p/s: dear best friend, you are not in the list because I met you already just now..=)

nota kaki : ayuh, balik KMB!

PBSM

2010-12-28T23:06:00.002+08:00

Haa,orang selalu musykil saya ni orang mana. KL ke Kuantan? Kejap kat KL, kejap kat Kuantan. Haha,yang penting dekat Malaysia, belum sampai Ireland lagi. Ehem. Kalau orang tanya saya asal mana, saya mesti akan ada long pause. Err, asal tuh kira camne ek? tempat lahir atau tempat membesar? Kalau tempat lahir, KL dan kalau tempat membesar, kita kira bahagi dua lah, KL-Kuantan. Tapi kalau ikut sekolah, Kuantan lah kan. Jadi, saya asal Kuantan kalau kita rujuk kepada pendefinisian asal sebagai tempat membesar. Tapinya, kalau kawan-kawan di KMB semua sedia maklum yang saya ni setiap minggu balik rumah. Eh,balik Kuantan ke? Hehe,mungkin belum segila tuh nak turun naik Lebuhraya Pantai Timur dan KL-Karak setiap minggu. Sebenarnya saya balik rumah dekat KL. Sebab saya lahir dan membesar di KL, automatiknya memang ada rumah kat KL. Hampir setiap minggu parents saya memang akan turun KL atas urusan kerja dan kadang tuh memang saja nak jenguk anak-anak mereka yang ~~comel~~. Saya akan balik Kuantan bila cuti panjang je macam semester break sekarang ni. Kenapa? Sebabnya saya tak suka nak balik Kuantan selalu sebab Kuantan ni heaven sangat untuk saya. Antara penyebab penyakit malas ada di Kuantan. Haha.

Ada pantai! Oh, saya suka gila pantai terutama Teluk Chempedak! Tapi saya tak suka mandi pantai. Pantai cantik dan menenangkan, tapi bila mengganas hurmm..Subhanallah,hebat ciptaan Allah kan! Belajar dari alam itu kan cara yang terbaik.
Makan dan makan dan makan. Saya gila seafood ( kenapa semua gila? )! Dan atas sebab saya selalu makan seafood yang segar bugar dari jeti nelayan Tg Api saya akan menjadi allergik bila saya makan ikan yang semestinya tidak segar dekat DS. Huhu,ampun mak cik DS! Tapi kat Kuantan memang ada tempat makan yang hebat2, tapi tak lah semewah The Apartment ke apa. Yang penting rasa! =D
Katil dan bilik sendiri. Ni memang contributing factor sebab boleh layan diri sendiri aka tidur sesedap rasa.=p
TV yang besaaarr! Best untuk tengok movie. Memandangkan saya tak berapa suka pergi wayang, saya memerlukan TV yang bagus untuk melayan movie-movie cetak rompak yang berlambak kat Kuantan ni. Tapi saya beli yang tak ada dekat wayang je, jangan risau saya sokong industri tempatan! =p

Banyak lagi sebab kenapa saya cinta Kuantan lebih dari KL. Tapi KL tetap mendapat tempat kalau tak manalah saya nak pergi setiap hujung minggu. Boleh kebosanan duduk kat KMB walaupun ada roomate yang melampau-lampau rajin yang seharusnya dijadikan inspirasi dan tauladan. Tak gitu? Makanya dengan ini saya mengumumkan, azam tahun baru saya bersempena semester akhir di KMB....jeng..jeng..( diiringi bunyi drum ).... SAYA AKAN ~~CUBA~~ KURANGKAN BALIK SETIAP MINGGU dan akan berusaha bersungguh-sungguh untuk menghadapi final exam May nanti. Sesungguhnya saya perlu menghayati KMB dengan lebih mendalam agar akan lekat di jiwa saya supaya saya sedih tinggalkan tempat ini satu hari nanti. Hehe, tuh je.. Saya rasa saya dah kurang betul sikit, mengantuk.. Kan saya kata, rumah Kuantan ni sejuk asyik buat rasa nak tidur, nak-nak musim tengkujuh ni. ( Tetiba teringat Langit Petang..hehe ) Tuhje, salam!

p/s: azam anda?

ehh...cop! mesti tertanya kenapa PBSM? Persatuan Balik Setiap Minggu, dan sayalah pengerusinya. Penyakit keturunan sejak zaman sepupu saya batch berapa entah. Ngee..=D

Hadeyhh

2010-12-26T22:53:00.000+08:00

Tinggal seminggu je lagi sebelum cuti semester 3 berakhir. 5hb nanti akan bergelar pelajar semester akhir!! Macam tak percaya, dua tahun ini akan berakhir dan peperiksaan akhir is just around the corner. Dan adakah Ireland itu akan saya jejak September nanti? Tapi EE say tak siap lagi walaupun tinggal lagi seminggu. Awak, tolong nasihat saya boleh? Saya perlu rajin untuk impian kecil saya ini.

p/s: Malaysia hebat jugak, 3-0! Tak sia-sia beli jersi kat bukit jalil. Tapi sedih mengenangkan berapa ramailah agaknya yang tak solat tadi tengok bola. Musafir barangkali. =)

aku ingin mencintaimu by edcoustic

2010-12-15T11:46:00.000+08:00

Love

2010-12-13T17:35:00.004+08:00

"If God would love his servant He would call Archangel Gabriel and tell him "I love this person, therefore love him." And Gabriel would love him and call out in the heavens "God loves this person, therefore love him." And the inhabitants of the heavens would love him. Then he would be embraced by the people of this world.

But if God would abhor his servant, He would call Gabriel and tell him "I abhor this person, therefore abhor him". And Gabriel would abhor him and call out in the heavens " God abhors this person, therefore abhor him." And the inhabitants of the heavens would abhor him. Then he would be abhorred by the people of this world."

(narrated by Muslim)

Subhanallah!

Nothing more can be said.

Let us work together to become the person loved by Allah!

Comel dan bangga gila kan kalau nama kita diumumkan kat syurga?

I Love You!

2010-12-13T15:41:00.008+08:00

Interesting topic is it? Some of my friends asked me why I never comment anything about this matter. Well, basically it is not that I don't care when people around me busy with their partners. It just that,hurmm... I did couple before and I know how it feel. That is why I never say no to my friends who are involved. It just that I feel I am not the right person to say it. It is hard to say goodbye, indeed. I admit it because I have been with him for 3 years long and to say goodbye? Wow, that will need a lot of courage! All this while I never know about couple is haram, it is just recently ( when I'm in KMB ) that I know about it. We discussed about it and we did not reach to a solution. So we just let it be. Time flies and I worked extremely hard but I find it is hard for me to understand certain things that I studied. I was confused because I think I did revise and did a lot of exercises but why I can't still get it right? Long pause. Sigh. I was flipping through my notebook where I scribble everything inside it ;

"If you cannot find peace in your life where you think everything seems right to you, the answer is in your heart." ( Anonymous )

Oh, Allah! Please give me an answer to this misery. I recheck everything ; relationship with Allah, with my family, with my teachers and my friends. None. Everything seems okey to me. At least, for me. I came across this verse :

"Say: If your fathers, your sons, your brothers, your wives, your kindred, the wealth that you have gained, the commerce in which you fear a decline, and the dwellings in which you delight are dearer to you than Allah and His Messenger, and striving hard and Fighting in His Cause; then wait until Allah brings about His Decision (torment). And Allah guides not the rebellious folk."

( At- Taubah : 24 )

I questioned myself. Do I love Allah and Rasul more than everything else I have in my life? Long pause again. But what strengthen me is this hadith ;

"There are three characteristics whoever has them will taste the sweetness of faith: that God and His Messenger are more loved by him than everything else, that he loves or does not love a person only for God's sake and that he would hate to revert into disbelief just as he would hate to be thrown into fire." (narrated by Bukhari)

Stunted by the hadith. Gotcha! I get the answer already! Thanks ya Allah! But.. But? Will I have the gut to say it loud to him? Can I do that? I was thinking too much like whether is there going to be anyone else that will marry me? The fact that I'm gonna serve the country as a doctor, will I have the time? But I don't want my mum to search for me? Haha. lame right? I can't believe I could even think that far. I seek for advice from my ustazah, surprisingly she didn't immediately say "Khadijah, you are wrong because you are walking towards zina! ". I was expecting that actually. She knew about our relationship ( well, almost the whole school know about it ) but she always said to me " Leave some love for yourself. Don't give it all ". With the advice, I get the courage and tell him about it. Alhamdulillah, everything was easy and I never feel so free and calm like that moment. He actually want to tell me the same thing and yeah we both agreed and felt happy about it. And surprisingly, everything is much easier to be understood! Subhanallah! Hee.. =)

Well, our family knows about our relationship ( and they are happy about it ) but not to the extend to allow us to get married now. That's why I said to him that this is not right. Though we get the blessings but this shouldn't be the way and he should wait till the day ( if he want to ) . Plus, it is a long distance relationship ( he's studying in the land of anbiya's ) so it is hard to predict what is gong to happen in the future. So, I just leave this matter to Allah. What I believe is as what have been told by my grandpa ; " There are two things that has been destined : jodoh and death " . But no doubt that I actually pray that he will be the one ( blushing ) but again I leave this totally to Allah. For now, I want to love Allah and Rasulullah. I want to love Islam because I have been neglecting it all this while. And of course I need to prepare myself fully because marriage is a serious matter and to be good at it I must be a VERY GOOD MUSLIMAH.

Anyway, I would love to thank to Allah for giving me the chance to know him. He taught me about Islam a lot! But then very much thanks to Allah because still loving me and give me the courage to do so. If I am the previous Khadijah, I will never have the strength to do so. I love you so much Allah!!

Friends, I am not going to say whether couple is haram or halal. Even so, we were not like ordinary couple : holding hands etc ( naah! never do that ). But then, it is a waste if every minutes of your life has been wasted to remember someone instead of filling it by remembering Allah ( you even get pahala for that! ). So, think by yourself. Orang Melayu cakap, bersusah-susah dahulu, bersenang-senang kemudian. Kalau kita bersusah-susah menjauhi zina sebelum ikatan yang sah, insya allah setiap detik selepas diijabkabulkan nanti akan menjadi sangat manis untuk kita. Pray to Allah so that you will have the courage, the strength. I know it is very difficult, but I did it! You can do it too! Chaiyok2!!

Current status : Single but not available. =)

p/s : my brother has been talking about marriage recently and I think I'm a bit influenced by him. hee, don't blame me!

p/s/s : thanks Allah for letting me to study in KMB! It is a wise choice and I never regret it.

picture taken from : stumbleupon.com

monolog seorang kakak

2010-12-12T12:11:00.002+08:00

Ada antara kita yang ada adik, ada yang tak ada.. Ada yang adiknya ramai, seorang , dua, dan seterusnya. Saya? Ada seorang adik perempuan. Istimewanya dia di hati saya ini hanya saya dan Allah sahaja yang tahu. Terus terang saya bukanlah seorang yang suka mempamerkan perasaan sayang secara terang-terangan. Sayang adik? Ahaa, bukan di hadapan dia ditonjolkan kasih sayang itu.

Awal kelahiran dia, hari raya keempat. 12 tahun sudah berlalu tapi perasaan pada saat itu masih kekal di ingatan. Sebagai bongsu tak jadi, memang sakit hati dengan kelahiran ini. Alaa, budak tujuh tahun hingusan tahu apalah sangat. Memang menyampah sebab semua kasih sayang beralih kepada si kecil bulat. Teringat punyalah nakal dan sakit hati terhadap adik sampai dibukanya stokin dan sarung tangan dan cabut bengkung dia. Melalak-lalak dia tapi diri tersenyum puas. Muahaha.. Dahinya gendul ( betul ke ejaan nih ) macam penyanyi Aerosmith. Sebab tuh saya panggil dia flowerhorn kebetulan ikan tuh tengah famous masa tuh. Semua orang sibuk bela ikan flowerhorn. Haha. Kejam, memang kejam.

Adik saya memang terserlah kepandaiannya. Berjalan cepat. Membaca cepat dan lancar. Semuanya awal dibandingkan kanak-kanak lain seusia dia. Masuk darjah satu, dia kebosanan sebab semua yang cikgu ajar kat sekolah dia dah tahu. Akademiknya usah disangkal. Nombor satu dari darjah satu sampai darjah enam. Hanya sekali dalam hidup dapat 4A1B. Yang lain semua 5A dengan markah bermula dengan angka sembilan. Masuk pertandingan tak pernah kalah, ada sahaja kejayaan demi kejayaan walaupun tanpa sebarang latihan. Kagum, saya memang kagum dengannya.

Kebencian semasa sekolah rendah dulu makin terpadam berubah menjadi sayang. Tapi sebab adik saya dah fikir saya benci kat dia jadi dia pun melakukan serangan balas. Ada sahaja benda yang nak dicari fasal dan berjaya membangkitkan kemarahan saya. Akhirnya saya yang dipersalahkan kerana dia adik. Apa-apa semua kena mengalah. Sebab dia adik. Kami memang tak kamcing, tak boleh duduk dekat mesti bergaduh. Walaupun hanya berebut bahagian ikan favret. Remeh memang remeh. Kadang saja cari pasal dengan mencubit dan berlari. Tapi saya tahu dia takkan mampu kejar saya sebab dia bukan kaki sukan macam saya. Lari sikit dah semput. Haha.

Tapi sekarang, semakin membesar. Semakin saya mengenali Islam semakin saya sayangkan adik saya. Dalam diam jelah tapinya. Setiap doa dipenuhi doa untuknya seorang. Kejayaan dia dunia dan akhirat. Saya tak pernah cakap saya sayangkan dia. Tapi tiap kali saya balik, kesian dia kena bebelan saya pagi petang siang malam. Tapi adik, tahulah itu caranya. Cara untuk saya tunjukkan saya peduli dan saya sayang. Ketika dilanda krisis, sedih melihatkan mukanya yang tak faham apa-apa dan hanya mengikut saya berlalu pergi mencari ketenangan. Sabarlah wahai adik, kau akan faham satu hari nanti. Tabahlah wahai adik, hidup ini memang penuh dengan cabaran.

Kini 12 tahun berlalu. Adikku akan melangkah ke alam sekolah menengah. Ketika dia menghadapi UPSR, aku berdoa siang dan malam minta agar Allah membantunya, terangkan hatinya walaupun aku tahu dia confirm2 dapat 5A. Tapi risaunya hati seorang kakak itu tidak dapat dibendung. Saat menunggu keputusan UPSR diumumkan, resah bertamu lagi dan fokus hilang ketika dalam kelas. Mujur ayah mengkhabarkan berita gembira itu. Kerisauan bertambah lagi. Sekolah mana lepas ni? Janganlah masuk sekolah harian. Berdoa lagi.. "Ya Allah ya tuhanku, kau tempatkanlah adikku di sekolah yang baik-baik. Yang dapat mendekatkan dia dengan Mu, agar dia dapat mencintaiMu sepenuh hatinya "

Adik..

Andai dirimu rasa terpaksa,maafkanlah. Maaf kerana memaksamu untuk masuk ke Maahad Tahfiz. Jujurnya kerana akak risau, risau akan keadaan sekarang. Masalah sosial semakin memuncak dan takut kau terpengaruh. Bukan tidak mahu kamu menyambung legasi keluarga di SMART, tapi biarlah kamu ke sekolah berasrama. Sebab kami tiada di rumah untuk membimbingmu selalu. Untuk mendekatkan dirimu dengan Islam. Sebab itu akak menegah kamu masuk ke sekolah harian dan berusaha mempengaruhi ibu dan ayah untuk daftarkan kamu ke maahad. Tapi semalam akak gembira melihatkan wajahmu. Sudah 2 saringan kamu lepas untuk kemasukan ke maahad. Akak tahu begitu susah untukmu menghafaz helaian surah At-Taubah itu, melalui proses pemilihan sehingga 4 hari. Jauh di sudut hati, akak tersenyum bangga kamu sampai ke tahap ini dan berdoa agar adik dapat menjadi antara 40 terhebat itu. Akak bangga, sangat bangga sehingga menangis. Berusahalah adik, teruskan berlari. Kau pasti jadi insan hebat. Insya allah.

Setiap kali saya terasa diri ini akan dijemput Tuhan, setiap kali itu saya menangis. Ego ku membataskan segalanya. Takkan mungkin seorang akak akan meminta maaf kepada seorang adik. Tapi adikku, maafkanlah segala kekhilafan akak dan tahulah akak sangat sayangkan adik. Sangat-sangat, with all of my heart. Tiada yang lebih gembira bila akak terjumpa esei kamu ketika sedang berkemas ( walaupun dalam hati marah sebab kamu tak kemas bilik sendiri ). Tapi kepenatan hilang bila terpandang, "...person that I admire most in my life is my sister, my second sister..." Oh, dalam diam terharu kerana menjadi idola adik sendiri. Tapi adikku, akak bukanlah contoh terbaik. Cintaku pada Allah masih tipis, teguhnya imanku masih rapuh, masih tidak mampu menunjukkan contoh terbaik untukmu.

Adik..

Jadilah hafizah yang berjaya. Dunia dan akhirat. Paling tidak pun, cintailah Allah sepenuh hatimu. Jika akak dapat menjejakkan kaki ke bumi asing, akan akak sampai ke sana jika akak rasa akak boleh melepaskan kamu seorang di sini. Jika tidak, biarlah bermastautin di bumi Malaysia. Yang penting kamu akan sentiasa dekat dengan Allah, makin mendalam cintamu terhadap Islam. Jangan jadi seperti akak. Jadilah insan yang hebat dunia dan akhirat. I will always pray for you.

photo taken from http://lovemeow.com/2010/12/coco-and-peanut-sweet-calico-sisters/

Exam madness!

2010-11-22T16:56:00.005+08:00

Busy studying and preparing for exam even though still updating my blog. Huhu. Please pray for me so that I can do well in the exam this time. ( Praying hard )

Found this in the internet. Suddenly I love maths.. Haha..=p

Laziness is conquering the exam madness!

2010-11-18T07:07:00.001+08:00

M.A.L.A.S

Please, tell me that I must study hard

for this coming exam

I don't want to screw it up

Okey,must get to work

Lasagna madness, apologi kepada Wan

2010-11-16T06:34:00.006+08:00

Owh, ni first time masak lasagna jadi kalau rupa dia xsenonoh xsehebat dekat pizza hut mahupun secret recipe ke apa senyap je tau. Hehe.. Okeylah, the ingredients :

Meat sauce

1 ulas bawang besar dicincang & 1 ulas bawang putih diketuk2
carrot & kacang buncis ( ikut gembiralah nak sayur apa. )
125g ayam kisar ( ni sebenarnya ikut sedap hati, rasa nak banyak daging, letaklah byk2 )
1 cawan stok ayam ( stgh kiub pati ayam dicampur air panas sehingga=1 cawan )
5 sudu besar tomato puree
sebiji tomato bersaiz kecil yg didadu kan
parsley, pepper, garam secukup rasa

Cheese sauce

2 sudu besar butter dicairkan
2 sudu tepung gandum
1 cawan susu segar
mozarella cheese ikut tahap kekejuan anda ( saya punya 3 sudu besar )

Cara- cara nak buat :

Meat sauce

tumis bawang putih dgn bawang besar
masukkan carrot
masukkan ayam cincang ( daging lagi sedap tapi sebab my mum xboleh mkn daging ) sampai dia warna putih atau jadi berketul-ketul.
masukkan tomato puree
campakkan kacang buncis
next, curahkan stok ayam ke dalamnya
parsley, pepper dengan garam jangan lupa letak lak!
kacau-kacau lepas tuh masukkan tomato dan kacau lah sampai dia kering xberair

Cheese sauce

cairkan butter atas pan
masukkan tepung gandum, kacau rata-rata jangan bagi dia berketul
pastuh tambahkan susu dan kacau lagi sampai jadi likat
masukkan mozarella cheese dan tunggu lah sampai dia cair

Lepas tuh, griskan korangnye bekas dengan butter. Letakkan kepingan lasagna san remo yang dah ready made ( ni halal,jadi tak payah risau ). masukkan meat sauce dan curahkan cheese sauce ke atsnya, lepas tuh letak kepingan lasagna. Buat macam ni sampai agak-agak 4-5 lapisan macam tuh dan pastikan diakhiri dengan cheese sauce diatasnya. Last sekali, letakkan cheddar cheese diatasnya, bakarlah pada suhu 180 darjah selama 30 minit. Tapi sebelum tuh pastikan oven korang dah di-preheat kan dahulu barulah menjadi lasagna korang.

Senang kan? Sebab ada yang ready made, kalau x menangis nak membuat dia nye layer tuh. Enjoy!

Ezzati Nasir

2010-11-15T06:29:00.002+08:00

"..dan Yang mempersatukan hati mereka (orang-orang yang beriman). Walaupun kamu membelanjakan semua (kekayaan) yang berada di bumi, niscaya kamu tidak dapat mempersatukan hati mereka, akan tetapi Allah telah mempersatukan hati mereka. Sesungguhnya Dia Maha Gagah lagi Maha Bijaksana."

( Al-Anfal :8 )

Harga sebuah ikatan silaturrahim dan ya, saya sangat bertuah sebab ada seorang kawan yang sangat baik, Ezzati. Today is her birthday and I'm sad because I cannot be among the first few people to wish her last night. Tertidur, my apology. Hehehe.. Firstly,

Happy 19th Birthday!! May Allah bless you always, sis!

I met her on 2nd January 2008. It was two years and 11 months already the age of our friendship. I never thought that we will be best friend till this moment.

Things that I always remember about her :

her unique nose! hehe, no doubt lah sis.. jgn marah, kurniaan Allah tuh! =)
craziness towards lembuish things
her friendly and sporting family
and lamka..=p

*there's many to be remembered but these are the most significant ones.

Friendship kami macam cinta pandang pertama, terus bertaut sampai sekarang. Eceyh,mesti ko tengah geli-geli sambil baca kan.. Hehehe.. No, tell the truth only Allah knows the ultimate reason behind it. She knows me very well, though we don't really have time to see each other plus insya allah I'm flying to Ireland ( praying hard and working extremely hard for it! ) but indeed we are still best friend. Crying, laughing and so much things. I remember those days having nasi lemak at Tree Under, Telok Cempedak. And buka puasa at Secret Recipe, KLCC in which I'm kind of "marah" why you didn't tell it was swatch instead of alba. Haha,silly little things yet very meaningful. Plus the Cosmoworld, Berjaya Times Square? It's killing me at that moment. Alhamdulillah, masih bernafas sehingga hari ini. Hehe..

Ezzati Nasir,

Saya nak jadi pengapit awak, sebab saya tahu awak akan kahwin dulu sebelum saya. Haha..

Saya nak jadi orang pertama tengok baby awk bagi kategori rakan-rakan, sebab saya tahu memang awak akan ada baby dulu sebelum saya.

Saya teringin nak ada masa awak graduate nanti, sebab memang awak akan grad sebelum saya..

Dan macam-macam lagi tapi saya malu nak senaraikan.

Ak kan macho, tak tunjuk kasih sayang depan-depan..=p

Tapi kan,

Andai suatu hari nanti, Allah jemput saya pergi

Sebelum sempat saya lakukan semua itu dengan awak

Saya nak awak tahu

Awak kawan paling baik saya pernah ada dalam hidup saya

Terima kasih sebab bagi ruang untuk saya dalam hidup awak

Terima kasih sebab selalu ada di saat saya memerlukan

Terima kasih sebab selalu ada untuk berkongsi kegembiraan saya

Terima kasih dan terima kasih dan terima kasih untuk segalanya

Andai saya pergi dahulu

Kenanglah semua memori yang ada

Tolong tengokkan orang-orang kesayangan saya

Dan saya sangat berharap

Persahabatan ini akan berkekalan dunia dan akhirat

Sebab ianya persahabatan kerana Allah

I planned to write more about this birthday entry but it's morning and my brain is not fully working yet. Hehehe. Anyway, sis Happy Birthday!! Thanks a lot for this awesome years of friendship! May Allah bless you always!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!

Oh, Allah! Thanks so much for blessing me with such a great friend! Please ya Allah, retain our friendship and bless the ukhwah forever. Thanks Allah, I could never ask more from You.

deliciously east!

2010-11-14T00:28:00.001+08:00

enough said. i'm east coast people and i'm proud of it. =D

p/s: saja nak bagi awak jeles.=p

2010-11-04T19:27:00.004+08:00

woahhhh..agak lama tak update blog sebab :

portfolio
TOK essay - done
IA - need to edit it
EE - improvise
homeworks!
IRP study group
study untuk exam
IOC
IOP- done!
edit worldlit
dan mungkin berlambak lagi yang tak tersenarai

Agak exhausted juga sebab sekarang ni memang kemuncak IB lah rasanya, dengan tak sempat makannya dan juga tak bersenamnya. Sampai rasa sekarang dah jadi macam garfield, okey itu agak over sebab tak naik pun berat cumanya entah, lemau rasa. Huhu.. Tapi insya allah, after the exam ended everything gonna be fine. Sampai saat ini masih bernafas dengan izin Allah dan masih dapat mengharungi ranjau sepanjang IB nih tapi kadang sedih sangat sebab tak sempat nak dating dengan Allah lama-lama. Aaaa, how ungrateful I am but I am trying, trying my best to be a good abid.

Sampai hari tuh rasanya macam kena "tegur" dengan Allah indirectly sebab masa tuh sibuk buat portfolio maths part 1 tapi buntu tak dapat idea tiba ada usrah ( xdelah tiba-tiba, memang tahu pun ). Esoknya nak kena hantar portfolio tapi cam alamak camne nih.. Berat gila rasa, malas, rasa nak jerit semua ada. Dalam hati asal lah dalam banyak2 malam, malam ni juga nak buat usrah. Selepas dipaksa oleh Adnin dan dilembutkan hati dengan kata2 rumet tersayang, okeylah pergi jugak walaupun muka memang tahap hurmm, mungkin tak redha gila nak pergi.

Tapi kan, bila pergi usrah tuh tengok satu video pasal cintanya Rasulullah kat umatnya pastuh dengan video pasal kebergantungan kita kepada Allah, cam zapppp! Huhuhu..makanya manusia inilah yang paling teruk sekali menangis sebab macam punyalah sibuk dengan duniawi sampaikan macam tak isikan hati ini dengan mengingati Allah dan memuji kebesaranNya. Balik bilik, nak sambung balik kerja portfolio yang dari tadi tak gerak2 tak ada idea punya fasal. Tiba dapat ilham dan senang je nak buat semua benda dan alhamdulillah settle within one night.

Cam, kalau kita betulkan niat kita dan beriman dengan kekuasaan Allah dan berdoa kepadaNya insya allah akan dipermudahkan jalan untuk kita. Dan apa yang kita buat semua, beribadah , berdoa even buat maksiat sekalipun satu pun tak bagi effect kat Allah betul tak? Bagi effect kat kita, syurga atau neraka pengakhirannya? Tapi Allah ni punyalah Maha Penyayang walaupun Dia tahu hamba dia ni selalu lupa kat Dia tapi Allah tetap menjaga kita. Beri nikmat macam-macam kat kita. Subhanallah!

Jadi, wahai kawan-kawanku yang sedang berjuang walaupun kat mana kalian sekalipun janganlah lupa apa tujuan hidup kita ini. Nak buat satu benda kena tanya : benda ni bagi benefit ke tak? ke hanya sementara ? Kalau niat kita untuk belajar kerana Allah insya allah pahala itu pasti ada untuk kita. Tapi kalau kita niat sebab nak kaya sebab mak suruh ke apa, buat penat je nanti kat akhirat kita tengok dalam buku catatan kita semua penat lelah kita belajar tak dicatitkan oleh malaikat dan lagi sedih kalau catatan2 itu sebenarnya jika dicatitkan akan membawa kita ke syurga. Minta jauh dari semua itu dan semoga kita semua menjadi penghuni syurga di akhirat nant.

Maafkan diri ini atas segala kekurangan, ini hanya peringatan untuk diri sendiri dan juga kita semua. Jaga diri kawan-kawan. =)

=)

2010-10-21T17:59:00.002+08:00

Alhamdulillah, IELTS result is out. I scored 7.5 out of 9. As expected I got 6.5 for writing , the lowest compared to other components because I was blank that time and I can't write that well. Anyway, one requirement is met already : at least 6.5 for IELTS. ( checked! )

Next : 36 final exam excluding bonus point and yes I'll work hard for that.

Checklist : EE done, TOK essay done, IOC next in line plus the english oral. wish me luck!

Working in Progress

2010-10-16T11:20:00.001+08:00

EE in progress..Huhu..But alhamdulillah, my TOK essay is done and has been checked and rechecked by teacher! Just need to rephrase some of the sentences. Till then, need to do my EE!

2010-10-10T17:22:00.001+08:00

sometimes, i feel there's something wrong

but i don't want to know about it

i'm afraid of it

to know the real fact if there's any

proof me wrong

tell me everything gonna be fine..perhaps

First Weekend for Semester 3

2010-10-09T14:34:00.003+08:00

Yes, Semester 3 started in June and this is my first time spending a weekend in KMB for this semester. Surprised? Amazed? So do I. All this while though I had an IELTS class on Saturday afternoon but I will still go back after the class. But this time , I am quite lazy to go back because I just had my IELTS tests and I'm officially too tired to go to any family ceremony this weekend. So, I said to my brother, its okey you don't have to pick me up here in KMB. But now I'm kind of regret it and I think I almost cried. Haha. Entahlah Khadijah, camne kau nak pergi Ireland nasib dapat twinning. Tapi tuh lain, kita tau kita tak boleh nak balik every weekend macam kita dekat KMB yang rumah dekat sejam je kan. Apa salahnya nak jumpa family every weekend, bukan tiap-tiap hari. Nanti dah fly,karang rindu menyesal lak dulu tak selalu balik? Haha..Lame reasons but well my IELTS was pretty fine but I aim the highest will be 8 because I think I don't do pretty well for my speaking. Other components were satisfying for me. The listening part I think thanks to Allah, my place was only two tables away from the main speaker therefore I can hear it clearly though its not that sharp. My room mate is in Zoo Negara now, cleaning camel's area. Hehehehe and unfortunately for me I don't have her to membebel at me to stop doing nothing and get to study. I just don't have the mood because I'm here stuck in KMB during the weekend. It could be my worst nightmare. Sekian,terima kasih

Hati Ini

2010-10-08T17:55:00.003+08:00

Muslimat yang suci adalah muslimat yang dijaga oleh Allah.

Tidak sedikit pun Allah membenarkan mana-mana lelaki menyentuh dirinya walaupun hatinya.. Kerana Allah teramat mencintainya.

Tetapi andai kita bergelumang dengan cinta lelaki, di mana Allah untuk menjaga kita?

Allah seperti melepaskan kita kepada seorang manusia yang lebih banyak mengecewakan kita.

Jika Allah datangkan kesedaran dalam diri kita supaya meninggalkan cinta seorang lelaki, bermakna Allah mahu mengambil kita kembali untuk dijagaNya.

Mengapa masih ragu-ragu?

Kekuatan usah ditunggu tetapi harus dicari.

"sebesar-besar dosa adalah dosa yang dilakukan tika kita rasa berdosa melakukannya dan kita tahu apa yang kita lakukan itu berdosa " - Imam Ghazali

terima kasih kepada sahabatku kerana berkongsi. Sudah lama disimpan sms ini tetapi baru hari ini ada kesempatan untuk post di blog. Kerana tidak mahu luput dari ingatanku akan kata-kata ini.

Oh, organic!

2010-10-06T17:17:00.003+08:00

Situation : Chemistry class

Weather : Raining heavily

Students : Start to move to other places

Teacher said :

" What are you worrying about ? Don't worry you are not going to be dissolved by the rain"

Terima kasih ya Allah

2010-10-04T19:04:00.002+08:00

Sedang hati ini bersedih taktala mengenangkan EE yang tak dapat-dapat diselesaikan masalahnya.

Sedang hati ini terasa begitu lemah sekali

Terasa nipis sekali keimanan ini

Terasa hendak mengalah dalam perjuangan ini

Buntu memikirkan jalan penyelesaian

Semuanya tidak berhasil dan semakin merumitkan. Haih EE..

Mata terpandang bait-bait surah Al-Insyirah indah di atas hamparan bulu arnab tergantung di dinding sebelah meje belajar pemberian sesorang ; ole-ole dari Mesir khabarnya,surah kegemarannya. Tafsiran bait-bait ayat Al-Insyirah sungguh menyentuh hati ini ;

Bukankah Kami telah melapangkan bagimu dadamu?
Dan Kami telah meringankan daripadamu bebanmu.
Yang bererti tanggunganmu?
Dan Kami telah meninggikan bagimu sebutan namamu?
Oleh itu, maka ( tetapkanlah kepercayaan mu ) bahawa sesungguhnya tiap-tiap kesukaran disertai kemudahan.
(Sekali lagi ditegaskan ) bahawa sesungguhnya tiap-tiap kesukaran disertai kemudahan.
Kemudian apabila engkau telah selesai ( daripada sesuatu amal salih ), maka bersungguh-sungguhlah engkau berusaha ( mengerjakan amal salih yang lain ).
Dan kepada Tuhanmu sahaja hendaklah engkau memohon ( apa yang engkau gemar dan ingini )

Macam Ya Allah! Terima kasih banyak-banyak Allah dan maafkanlah hambaMu ini yang melupai janji-janji dan pemberian-pemberianmu yang sudah lama tertulis di dalam kitab suci Al-Quran. Saban hari ayat ini tergantung di situ tapi hati ini tidak pernah mengambil iktibar,masih lagi bersedih dan ada cubaan untuk berputus asa. Itu EE sahaja Khadijah bukannya boleh nak dibandingkan dengan tiket untuk pergi berjihad. Teringat Nasrah ( pen pal tersayang ) pernah cakap pasal ayat ni masa tengah bersedih pasal placement tapi tak lekat2 ingatan tuh. Terima kasih ya Allah kerana mengilhamkan kepada sahabatku untuk memberi hadiah ini sebagai ole-ole ; ayat indah dari mu. This is now my favorite surah. Love you Allah, very-very much for giving me wonderful friends in this world dan atas teguran itu kerana hambamu ini terlupa dengan janjiMu kepada hamba-hamba yang berdoa dan bergantung harap hanya kepadaMu.

So,Khadijah insya Allah akan dipermudahkan jalan untuk buat EE nih. Esok kena try call company tuh lagi, harapnya ada jawapan yang positif. To EE advisor ku, minta maaf banyak-banyak tak boleh meet the due date..huhu..

Friend In Need is A Friend Indeed

2010-10-01T19:34:00.004+08:00

In my life I don't really have a best friend for quite a long time. Every time I want to be a best friend to someone that person will disappear from my life like when I was in primary, my good friend moved to Banting. We kept in touch for quite a time but she disappear when she went to a boarding school in Form 4. When we met again, a lot of things has changed and we never be a best friend. Fine, then I move on to another person, the same thing happen. Considering I have been many times hurt by my friends whom back stabbed me I don't really believe with the word friend. At that time I think people did good things because they want a return. So I just be friend with every one but I never be extremely good to anyone of them. I guess Allah loves me very much, when I was in Form Five I was in charge of Form One registration and I was on my way from the hostel when a car stopped in front of me. A girl came out of the car with her parents and she walked towards me and I lend a hand and showed her dorm which happen to be the same as mine and to be exact her bed is just on top of mine. From that moment, we become friends though not in the same class but our friendship really works! Yes, she is my best friend till now though we sometimes argue about small things especially when now it is like my habit to say "cacat" to every unpleasant things that I see ( she dislike it ). Thanks,sis! Love you with all of my heart! =))

Speaking of high schools, I believe some of my friends will actually said that I am the miss-no-news at all. Frankly, it is not that I am too busy to keep in touch with every one. I do browse through their profile but somehow every time I browsed there's uneasy feeling seeing friends changed. A lot I mean. I am not saying that I am good now, I was bad before and thanks to Allah for showing me the path to Islam. I am one step nearer to Allah and one step away from my history. When every time I went out and I accidentally bumped into my friends, they looked at me as if I am an alien because my dressings a bit has changed. But hey, I'm still the old Khadijah but insya allah with a new faith and deeper love to Allah. Only few friends are still treating me like the old me, others sometimes hurmm. Deep in my heart, I'm praying that they will also one day have the chance to feel what is like to know Allah, to love Him and mostly to know the beauty of Islam. I never bother to know about all these things before until I went to KMB. It was the best decision I had ever made though I cried with all of my heart and begged my parents to send me here (seriously!). I don't know what is the pulling force as I know nothing about KMB or IB at that time, it just that I want to go there! Beautiful plan by Allah,subhanallah. But yet still a lot of things have to be done especially when I have the difficulties to remember dalil/hadis/sirah/verses/hukum hakam and every time I have to refer back but yes that is the process of learning. Nanti lama2,lekatlah kat akal tuh khadijah.

KMB ,KMB, KMB. I love KMB very much because all the people here are very nice and good. My friends never judge me and they never rank anyone. When I have problems they will come to rescue. I have an awesome room mate though she always bully me. Fantastic classmates and peers and they really cheer me up every day despite the stress that I have to bear. But its okey, this is the time to train myself and I'm getting used to it. It is all thanks to Allah.

Setiap apa yang berlaku dalam hidup kita, Allah dah susun dengan begitu cantik sekali kerana dia yang Maha Mengetahui. Dalam hidup ini tiada istilah apa yang berlaku kepada kita adalah tidak adil kerana setiap percaturan itu sudah adil kerana Allah itu Maha Adil. Yang tidak adil sebenarnya adalah kita sebagai manusia yang suka mengadili orang lain mengikut nafsu masing-masing sehingga setiap apa yang berlaku jika mana ianya tidak memberi keuntungan kepada kita, kita mengatakan perkara itu adalah tidak adil. Maafkan diri yang hina ini jika ada yang terasa atau tersentuh, kita semua makhluk ciptaan Allah yang seharusnya saling mengingati ke arah kebaikan. Dan hargailah setiap orang yang berada di sekeliling kita dan ajaklah mereka ke arah kebaikan kerana yakni sebenarnya setiap di antara kita ni mempunyai tanggungjawab untuk berdakwah dan tugas itu bukan terletak hanya kepada insan yang mempunyai gelaran ustaz,ustazah ataupun yang tengah belajar dalam bidang syariah, tafsir ke ape mahupun para pelajar lulusan sekolah agama. Pendakwah itu adalah kita semua! =)

Alhamdulillah

2010-09-30T07:23:00.002+08:00

Semalam balik dari KMB terus pergi KLCC sebab nak pergi Petronas Art Gallery. Dalam perjalanan sangatlah jam sampai boleh online guna laptop dalam kereta. Tapi tak teringat pun nak buka yahoo group because I have been doing that for weeks tunggu result interview hari tu. Kira semalam nak hari bebas KMB ( as if it can be done..=p ) . Then, teman abang beli suit for his convocation this Monday ( thanks to Kasukma, I can attend the ceremony! ) . Sometimes macam tak faham apa jelah bezanya baju lelaki, ada line sikit yang ni cutting macam sexy sikit etc etc tapi basicly macam sama je. Harganya mak aihhh mahal kot, kalah baju perempuan. Tapi sebab lelaki jarang shopping mungkin worth the value I guess. Went back home, umi ym me ( she's on the bus online-ing on the way back to klate ). Told me about the ACMS result is out! Aaa..macam ya Allah. Baru je tadi doa dengan Allah supaya dapat tahu result itu dengan cepat. Pup, macam tuh je nikmat Allah. Tapi memang berdebarlah masa nak download senarai tuh, scrolled down yeay! Alhamdulillah, I get the place but don't know whether it gonna be in Galway or Cork. Macam ya Allah, best gile nikmatMu! Hari-hari berdoa minta tak nak dah pergi interview ( aka nak lah dapat ACMS nih ) dan Allah mendengar doa dari hati kecil insan yang hina ini. Cinta Allah itu sangat hebat, sepanjang masa ada je nikmat yang Allah berikan kat kita. Dan kalau kita memohon pertolongan Allah dengan jalan sabar, syurga itulah ganjarannya. Best gila, perlu sabar dan jangan pernah berputus asa insya allah ganjaran dariNya sangat besar. Okey, tuh je. Pagi ini perlu ke PTS Publication Company sebab nak buat EE. See, IB will always be with me though it is holiday now. Haha, tapi Allah itu lagilah sentiasa lagi dekat, lagi dekat daripada urat di leher kita. Subhanallah. Cuma kita je yang tak pernah nak merasai dan menikmati dengan sebetulnya betapa dekatnya Allah dengan kita. Petang ni insya allah berangkat ke Kuantan.

18 Syawal

2010-09-28T16:05:00.004+08:00

Isu Gabung Puasa Sunat & Qadha

Oleh:

Zaharuddin Abd Rahman

http://www.zaharuddin.net/

Isu menggabungkan puasa qadha dan syawal sememangnya amat popular, pandangan ringkas saya adalah seperti berikut :-

Tidak elok untuk menggabungkan kedua-duanya bagi mereka yang mampu (dari sudut kesihatan tubuh dan lain-lain) untuk memisahkannya. Ini kerana sepengetahuan saya tiada dalil yang spesifik membuktikan Nabi SAW pernah melakukannya atau menganjurkan kepada para sahabat untuk menggabungkannya.

Apabila Nabi, sahabat dan salaf soleh tidak melakukannya maka pastinya ia bukanlah amalan yang terpilih dan terbaik kerana pilihan Nabi SAW dan para sahabat selamanya adalah yang terbaik.

Malah terdapat juga hujjah-hujjah yang menyebabkan pandangan yang yang mengharuskan penggabungan ‘qadha dan ganti’ itu dipersoalkan, iaitu :-

1. Jika seseorang mengatakan boleh gabung puasa qadha (yang wajib) dengan puasa syawwal (yang sunat) maka sudah tentu selepas ini timbul pula individu yang cuba menggabungkan solat wajib dengan solat sunat, seperti gabungan solat isyak dengan terawih, atau subuh dengan ‘tahiyyatul masjid’ atau dengan solat sunat fajar, atau solat jumaat dengan solat sunat ‘tahiyyatul masjid’. Maka ini pasti menyebabkan masalah lain timbul dalam ibadah wajib termasuk rekaan-rekaan pelik seperti solat fardhu subuh campur istikharah dan lain-lain.

2. Menurut Prof. Dr Syeikh Abd Malik as-Sa’dy (ex-Lajnah Fatwa Iraq) dan Prof Dr Mohd ‘Uqlah el-Ibrahim (Jordan) mereka berpendapat bahawa amalan wajib tidak boleh digabungkan dengan apa-apa amalan wajib atau sunat lain, kerana amalan wajib memerlukan tumpuan khusus yang tidak berbelah bahagi semasa pelaksanaannya dan ia perlu bagi mengangkat tuntutan kewajibannya. Justeru, tindakan menggabungkan ini pasti mengurangkan kesempurnaan hamba dalam menunaikan tuntutan wajib mereka. Wallahu a’lam.

3. Tindakan A’isyah ra yang melewatkan Qadha pula boleh di jadikan hujjah bahawa beliau mengasingkan kedua-dua puasa Qadha dan Syawwal. Maka ini lah yang terpilih sepatutnya. (tidak gabungkan kerana aisyah tidak menggabungkannya) . Aisyah menyebut :

كأن يكون عليّ الصيام من شهر رمضان فما أقضيه حتى يجئ شعبان

Ertinya : Kewajiban ke atasku untuk puasa (Qadha) dari puasa Ramdhan, tidaklah aku menggantinya sehingga datang sya’ban” ( Riwayat Muslim, no 101)

4. Amalan wajib (qadha) memerlukan niat yang ‘jazam’ (tepat dan pasti) maka tindakan mengabungkan ia dengan niat puasa sunat mungkin boleh merosakkannya kepastiannya. Kerana itulah ulama yang mengizinkannya mencadangkan agar diniat puasa qadha sahaja, adapun syawwal itu dipendam sahaja dengan harapan Allah menerimanya.

Bagaimanapun, ulama yang mencadangkan ini jelas menyatakan bahawa tindakan menggabungkannya tetap mengurangkan pahala sunat syawwal ini kerana tidak diniat dan tidak dilakukan sepenuhnya (Hasyiah As-Syarqawi ‘ala al-Tahrir, Syeikh Zakaria Al-Ansary, 1/427; naqal dari Min Ahsanil Kalam Fil Fatawa, Atiyyah Saqr, 2/23)

5. Malah ada pula yang berhujjah bahawa amalan sunat tidak boleh ditunaikan sebelum amalan fardu. Demikian menurut Syeikh Abu Raghib al-Asfahani, Syeikh Ihsan Muhammad ‘Aayish al-’Utaibi dan juga di sebutkan oleh Dr Yusof Al-Qaradawi di dalam kitabnya Fiqh Awalwiyyat. Ini ada asasnya kerana berdasarkan hadith Nabi SAW

من صام رمضان ثم أتبعه ستاً من شوال فكأنما صام الدهر

Ertinya: “Barangsiapa telah berpuasa Ramadan kemudian diikuti dengan 6 hari dari dari Syawwal (puasa) maka ia adalah seperti (pahala) puasa ad-Dahr (setahun)” (Riwayat Al-Bukhari, no 6502).

6. Kita dapat melihat penggunaan ‘fe’il madhi’ iaitu ‘past tense’ bagi puasa Ramadan, mungkin sahaja boleh membawa makna sesiapa yang belum lengkap puasa Ramadannya perlulah melengkapkan dahulu, kemudian barulah mereka layak bagi mendapat peruntukan pahala sunat Syawwal.

7. Hujjah ulama yang mengharuskannya adalah hadith

” Sesungguhnya amalan itu berdasarkan kepada niat, dan bagi seseorang apa yang diniatkan.” (Riwayat Bukhari, no 1, 1/12)

Ia dilihat agak umum, memang benar apa yang diniatkan adalah penting, tetapi niat mempunyai kaedah dan cara-caranya bagi diterima, contohnya seperti niat solat yang di cadangkan di dalam mazhab Syafie dimulakan semasa lafaz takbiratul ihram di sebut, jika tidak niat itu tidak dikira. (Rujuk Al-umm, hlm 78, cet Baytul Afkar; Rawdhah At-Tolibin, An-Nawawi, cet Baytul Afkar, hlm 103).

Justeru, niat juga ada displinnya dan tidak boleh di buat sesuka hati di dalam ibadah.

Kesimpulan

Kesimpulan dalam yang mengutarakan perbincangan yang terbatas ini :

Elok sangat tidak digabungkan dan elok sangat didahulukan yang wajib (qadha) daripada sunat (syawwal);

Pandangan yang membolehkan saya anggap sebagai rukhsah “keringanan” bagi mereka yang mempunyai kesukaran kerana uzur dan tidak mampu untuk mengasingkannya. Antara ulama yang membolehkan untuk menggabungkannya adalah beberapa ulama dari mazhab Syafie (Mughni al-Muhtaj, 1/602), Assembly of Muslim Jurists in America (AMJA), Syeikh Atiyyah Saqar, panelis fiqh Islam online.net dan beberapa yang lain.

Sekian

_________

*Tambahan

(Mazhab Syafie)

Niat puasa enam tidak boleh disekalikan dengan puasa qadha.

Imam as-Syafie di dalam kitab muktabarnya al-Umm ketika mensyarahkan bab 'Innamal a'malu binniat (setiap amalan dengan niat) menyebut hendaklah dibezakan ibadah puasa ramadhan, puasa nazar, puasa kafarat, puasa qadha' dan puasa tatawwu' (sunat).

Imam Jalaluddin as Syuyuti di dalam kitab al Isybah juga berpendapat demikian hendaklah diasingkan puasa Ramadhan, atau nazar atau puasa sunnat.

MANAKALA jawapan [Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah, 10/383] dalam masalah ini seperti berikut:

"Alhamdulillah. Tidak ada salahnya berpuasa Isnin-Khamis untuk mengqadha' puasa Ramadhan yang tertinggal, dengan syarat puasa dilakukan dengan niat mengqadha puasa...... Mudah-mudahan (moga2) anda mendapat 2 ganjaran sekali, ganjaran melakukan Qadha' dan ganjaran melakukan puasa sunat, dan fadhilat yang Allah berikan itu luas. Walaupun jika anda hanya mendapat ganjaran mengqadha' puasa, ia adalah memadai, kerana mengqadha' puasa adalah lebih mustahak dari melakukan puasa sunat. Akan tetapi jika kamu berniat melakukan puasa sunat dan tidak berniat melakukan qadha', maka kamu masih belum lagi memenuhi tuntutan kefarduan. Maka masih lagi wajib melakukan qadha' puasa Ramadhan. Wa Allahu 'alam dan selawat dan salam kepada Nabi Muhammad saw dan keluarganya."

AKAN TETAPI,

jika terdapat masa yang sangat pendek (takut tertinggal peluang menunaikan puasa 6), berbanding dengan puasa qadha' yang banyak; seperti didalam kes wanita yang panjang haidhnya, dibenarkan melakukan puasa enam hari didalam bulan Syawwal, dan kemudian mengqadha'nya sebelum menjelang Ramadhan yang akan datang. Syeikh Ibn Utsaimin mengatakan ini merupakan pandangan yang lebih kepada kebenaran.

[Sharh al-Mumthi' 6/448].

Berkenaan persoalan tentang mestikah puasa enam Syawwal itu BERTURUT-TURUT SELEPAS HARI RAYA ATAU TIDAK?

Jawapan Lajnah Fatwa Tetap Arab Saudi dalam persoalan ini seperti berikut:

“Tidak semestinya dia berpuasa terus selepas hari raya. Bahkan harus untuk dia memulakan sehari atau beberapa hari selepas hari raya. Samada dia hendak berpuasa bersambungan ataupun berpecah-pecah dalam bulan Syawwal. Ia berdasarkan apa yang mudah baginya. Perkara ini luas (pilihannya)”. (Fatawa al-Lajnah al-Daimah li al-Buhuth al-‘Ilmiyyah, 10/391).

Wallahualam.

p/s : jadi mana-mana yang masih was-was ini sudah ada jawapannya. Jom kita ambil keberkatan melakukan amalan sunat berpuasa 6 hari di bulan Syawal ini..=)

Hari Raya

2010-09-13T21:58:00.002+08:00

Happy Eidulfitri everyone!

How's yours?

Mine was well okeylah, better than last year.. Income for this raya was quite "tempting"..Hehe

But that was not everything about raya. Had the opportunity to chit chat and catch up with all my cousins was great! Was in Pagoh ( in Muar,fyi ) two days before raya then on the second day of raya went back home. Later that night, went to Illiany's house with Ezzati. Yanie is going to Queen Mary University of London! Envy you so much and all the best for you my love! Next morning, pack up all the things and headed for Jengka which is about 2hours journey from Kuantan. Went to Jerantut, visited some of the relatives ( my father's aunties ) . I ate quite a lot but this time it is not rendang, lemang and all the common food but instead Pahang's traditional food which I cannot resist it. But still, I didn't gain any weight.. Wahahah,alhamdulillah. Earlier on today, we went to my auntie house about 15minutes drive from my grandparents' house then next is my ayah long's house just after the highway exit. Again, nice food plus delicious cempedak goreng!! I can still feel it at my taste buds..hehe.. Then, went back to Kuantan and here I am ; blogging and facebooking plus sms-ing and proudly I did nothing. So, I think I need to get back into real IB world and finish up my homeworks and do some revision. Huhu.. I'm trying to be a good girl here ( I manage to not to follow my brother to singapore tomorrow. though I really want to go to Universal Studio! Huhuhu ) anyway, this is just a random post. Oh, btw you are all invited to my house but this time no open house. Just text me and I'll cook something for you..hehe..takecare,salam

=( , =.=" , ^_^

2010-09-08T07:23:00.002+08:00

somebody is leaving me

i learned a lot from you

almost everything

about our Creator

about death

about life

about efforts

about success

but I don't want you to leave me yet

I still need you

so that I can become a better person

hope we will meet again

Love you, Ramadhan

to all my friends from the moment I know how to say hello till now , virtually or in reality. I wish all of you Happy Eidul Fitri, may we still can meet Ramadhan next year. just something to be pondered of, have we graduated with first class honor from this madrasah tarbiyah? Though you might not get the first class honor, but lets hope at least we are in the "dean's list" and that Allah accept all our deeds and efforts that we strive in this blesseful month. Don't forget to istiqamah in everything that we did this month and continue it for the rest of our life. Lastly, I would like to ask for your forgiveness if ever I had make any mistakes that hurt you, my friends. Hope we can still meet after the raya break, takecare and drive safely! Enjoy your holiday with family and don't forget the tones of homeworks ( ketupat EE, rendang TOK, kuih translation , lemang ranjau dan sirap pygmalion ). Haha, school freak? Naah, it just the amanah that has been trusted on us and it is a must for us to complete the task. Nanti kena soal kat akhirat camne? Till then, jae nae~

2010-09-06T15:13:00.001+08:00

Alaaa,Ramadhan dah nak habis..Huhu..Al-Quran tak khatam lagi camne nih? =((

p/s: kuih raya tak buat lagi, homework tak siap lagi.. apakah?

Hikmah Ramadhan

2010-09-04T13:20:00.002+08:00

To my dearest teacher, Ms Nazliah

please be strong

for yourself and for Irfan

Allah will always help you,teacher

Keep praying and hoping to Him

Because He will always listen to your prayers

And we will always be here for you teacher

Though we can't do much

But our support and prayers are always here for you..

Love you very much!

2010-08-26T23:10:00.003+08:00

"when you are married you actually have three rings ;

engagement ring, marriage ring and sufferring"

- quoted from drama Emily.

haha..I found its quite funny and ironic for me. What say you?

2010-08-24T16:38:00.001+08:00

Alhamdulillah.. It was far better than my mock interview.. Thanks to Allah.. I'm praying hard to get a place in Galway,insya allah..=))

Fighting Spirit Restored

2010-08-19T15:40:00.003+08:00

Phew, well Happy Ramadhan everyone!

Hope that all of you are making great in this wonderful month ; fasting, tadarus, tarawih, sedekah etc..You know, every single sunat deeds that we do, the pahala that Allah gave us is the same as the wajib. Wow, isn't He is THE GREATEST of ALL? Yeah,no one can deny the fact.

Ramadhan indeed has become a great month for me so far. Few sad things popped into my life and alhamdulillah since it is the month of patience and passion I am now fully recovered from my sadness and my fighting spirit is back! Yeay! Thanks to my friends that help me a lot during this hard moment. Few things to be shared ;

Placement!

Yeah, the placement result is out as I mentioned in the previous post. Though I didn't get my first country of choice, but I managed to put myself for PMC-ACMS. Well, Penang Medical College is offering twinning programme for University College of Dublin and RCSI in Dublin too. While ACMS is for Uni of Galway and Uni of Cork. Well, you might wanna to google it perhaps. Basically, at first I'm sad (very-very sad ) but then after a day of thinking deeply.. There's a hikmah, Allah loves me and that is why he place me there. I have never been away from my family and to be here in KMB is actually my first experience and I went back home every weekend, yes I mean it every weekend! To have the chance for twinning is actually suits me who is really a family-oriented type of person. I remember the verse from Al-Quran which is one of my favorite verses ;

"...But it is possible that you dislike a thing which is good for you, and that you love a thing which is bad for you. But Allah knows, and you know not."

Al-Baqarah ; 216

This verse really make me to keep going and have faith in Allah that every sad and good things that happen to us there's always a reason behind it. We will never know what will happen if I get a place in UK or I get a place in IUMC, I might be crying back home. Haha, I know it may sound childish but I guess that's me. If we think that we know ourselves the best, we are completely wrong. Only Allah knows us the best because He is The Creator and He knows everything! Well,think about that..=)

Dakwah

This issue actually has never been into my list ever since I know how to plan my future. But thanks to Allah again for placing me here in KMB, I can see that throughout the day I'm improving bit by bit. If He didn't send me Kak Alaq and Kak Athirah as my naqibah, I don't think I will be here now at this point. I can slowly feel the joy of "meeting" you , depending on you, crying in front of you and I know that everything that I do in this world in the end it is back to basic, Islam. It is useless to do something that is not lillahitaala and you get nothing in the end. Yes,literally you do get something but when the world comes to it ends will you actually have enough of pahala? I'm really afraid of my previous sins that I did ( believe me, you wouldn't wanna know about it ) and I always cry because of it, who am I in Allah's view? I always have some sort of mindset that Allah will never accept my taubat but hey! Don't you forget this verse ;

"When My servants ask thee concerning Me, I am indeed close (to them). I listen to the prayer of every suppliant when he calleth on Me; Let them also, with a will, listen to My call, and believe in Me; That they may walk in the right way."

Al- Baqarah : 186

So, don't stop praying to Allah. He always listen to our prayers every split second. Don't stop believing ( hehe..Glee! ) alright,okey stop Khadijah.. But then,yes! Don't stop believing in Allah, in your dream! So,keep fighting till the end of your life! And in the month of Ramadhan, let us pray harder to Allah because who knows that we might not be seeing Ramadhan next year like my beloved friend.. ( jannah, i love you and I know Allah loves you more than everyone else )

Till then, take care everyone! Help me to pray for my success, I have an interview on 24th August! Wish me luck! and yeah, Happy Ramadhan dan selamat beribadat dan kumpul banyak pahala!! =)))

Friend

2010-08-14T00:14:00.002+08:00

It is at one time

I feel so sad

I feel like I'm useless

With no hope

Far behind others

I started to make myself disappear

But

You notice me

You notice my sadness

You lend me a pat on my back

You whisper to me,"Chill,be patient"

You sent me a sms

A simple funny message that brighten up my day

I suddenly notice

There's friends behind me all this time

Hiding but looking

Thanks Allah for blessing me with these wonderful people of my life

Make my life much more meaningful

Love you Allah

Love you my friends

Thank you Allah

Thank you my wonderful friends..=)

footnote ; I got my placement already, don't ask me about it but its somewhere in Europe.. But I'm still hoping,believing and praying to Allah for my one small wish..

p/s: suddenly remembered the song,Rahmat Ujian by Mestica.. I talked to my adik2 usrah about it and now its time for me to apply it with my heart..thanks ya allah,please guide me..please guide me in searching for the truth..=))

August

2010-08-07T04:42:00.001+08:00

I'm looking forward for Ramadhan

Fiesta month

Pahala fiesta given by Allah, The Most Generous.

saya rindu

2010-07-19T15:51:00.002+08:00

Ya Allah..

Rindu ini bertandang lagi..

Sekuat mana saya cuba lawan..

Makin kuat rindu itu datang..

Tiap kali saya nak balik bilik saya..

Saya akan jalan laju-laju dan tunduk ke bawah tanpa menoleh ke kiri..

Saya tak nak tengok bilik awak..

Tiap kali saya dalam bilik sendirian..

Saya buat-buat sibuk atau tidur..

Sebab saya tak nak terbayang-bayang..

Sebab itu saya selalu balik..

Walaupun saya dah janji dengan Farah saya akan kurangkan balik..

Tapi saya tak boleh..

Sebab saya tak setabah itu..

Tiap kali Farah mainkan lagu itu..

Saya akan buat-buat tak dengar atau tergelak..

Sebab saya tahu Farah mainkan untuk sakat saya..

Tapi Farah tak tahu lagu itu kenangan JPAM

Pertama kali awak sama kumpulan dengan saya..

Kita nyanyi lagu itu sama-sama..

Walaupun saya tersipu tergagap gugup di khalayak..

Semalam saya update gambar-gambar..

Terselit gambar awak..

Tersenyum..

Walaupun awak benci gila JPAM..

Saya benci juga..

Tapi sebab itu kenangan saya bersama awak..

Tak jadi saya delete memori itu..

Saya cakap kat awak saya nak pakai tudung macam awak..

Tapi saya tak mampu lagi..

Saya tengah kumpulkan kekuatan saya..

Untuk jadi pejuang macam awak..

Saya tengah tambahkan ilmu saya..

Agar saya boleh yakin untuk bercerita tentang Islam..

Macam awak selalu cerita kat saya..

Saya elakkan apa-apa yang berkaitan dengan awak..

Bukan sebab saya benci awak..

Tak..

Tapi saya marah dengan diri saya yang tak kuat-kuat lagi..

Lemahnya saya sampai saya tak pergi Big Apple sampai sekarang

Lemahnya saya sampai bajumerah itu tak pernah saya pakai lagi..

Ya Allah..

Bantulah hambaMu ya Allah

Berikanlah aku kekuatan tahap maksimum

Untuk menghadapi perpisahan ini....

Al-fatihah

Esok

2010-07-14T23:56:00.002+08:00

saya sayang Allah

terima kasih Allah untuk segalanya

Insya allah hari esok akan dipermudahkan urusanku oleh Allah

Dia manusia

Aku manusia

Kami berdua berpaksikan kepada tuhan yang Maha Esa

Cuma berimankah dia kepadaNya?

Tebalkah iman dan cintaku kepadaNya?

Itulah yang membezakan

Tapi aku percaya

"Apakah manusia itu mengira bahawa mereka dibiarkan sahaja mengatakan,`Kami telah beriman' sedangkan mereka tidak diuji?" Al-Ankabut;2

Aku sayang Allah

Dan aku ingin buktikan aku memang hambaNya

Kebergantungan itu hanyalah kepada Allah

Sayang Allah..=))

sigh

2010-07-08T17:53:00.002+08:00

uk.ireland.australia.czech?

placement.placement.placement.placement

ranking.ranking.ranking.ranking

interview.interview.interview.interview

placement akhirat?

syurga? neraka?

ranking hamba allah?

interview dgn malaikat dalam kubur?

diam.

2010-07-07T20:30:00.001+08:00

rindu.

2010-07-03T00:55:00.002+08:00

saya suka bau towel lepas dibasuh dan dikeringkan di dobi.

saya tak siap buat kerja sekolah lagi

saya tak fikir lagi negara mana saya nak pergi

saya ada banyak tarikh maut yang perlu dikejar

saya tak hafal surah al-mulk lagi

saya nak balik rumah esok

saya rasa nak menangis

saya rindu ibu saya boleh tak?

minggu ni saya emosi sikit

saya asyik kurang sihat sejak minggu lalu

tapi say tahu saya sakit

demam semua tuh

sebab allah sayang saya

allah nak tolong saya hapuskan dosa

sebab saya sabar

demam pun seronok

sebab makan tak banyak

boleh diet dan jimat duit

ada kaitan?

saya rasa saya dah kurang betul

bye

esok saya nak balik rumah

bye

Monologue

2010-07-01T19:22:00.003+08:00

Alhamdulillah, dah lama tak update blog. Lame ke? Lamalah juga kot.. Baru submit personal statement yang sangatlah penting untuk apply ke mana-mana university especially those countries in europe. Dah habis pening kepala buat PS, sekarang tengah pening untuk pilihan negara.Dari dulu mengidamkan UK tapi bila tengok result macam tak berapa best je ( my point is not that bad but yet not that good..huhu ) mungkin tak layak nak apply UK yang khusus untuk orang-orang yang gempak. My next choice is Ireland! But then I prefer twinning for certain reasons. Plus ayah said that it is better for me to choose twinning. So, as a good daughter I should follow his advices. Well, he has more experience than me ; meeting freshly overseas grad students every year so perhaps he knows which university's products are the best. But I haven't discuss this matter with ibu and abang. But I had asked my senior in SMART, Kak Izzah who are now in Trinity College of Dublin, Ireland. She gave me few advices and tips and it really helped me out. But I guess I should ask my cousin's opinion who was in KMB and Manchester University. Plus Bro Hasnol who is doing twinning program between RCSI-PMC. I really have to consider this matter very carefully because it is my future, of course I want to secure a place somewhere in European countries. Some asked me why I didn't go for varsities in Aussie/ NZ? The main reason is because I'll be at disadvantage on my age because we'll only be flying to these countries on Feb2012 where else for UK and Ireland somewhere in September2011. It make a lot of difference you know. Especially when it comes to the part when my brother ask me, " then,at what age are you getting married". Haha, silly yet quite a serious matter. Though it is all kerja Allah but somehow yes being in a strong Malay family it is quite a very-very serious matter. Hurmm, till then.. Still in dilemma and I'm quite busy finishing my maths portfolio. Need to submit it on Monday. Huhu.. Though the IELTS class is going on this Saturday till 5.30pm I am insist to go back home in KL because my big bro is coming back from umrah! yeay! can't wait to meet him and my beloved family of course..Jae-nae~

It has been a year full of memoirs!

2010-06-23T16:13:00.002+08:00

Last year on the same date, I registered into Kolej MARA Banting. Without knowing what exactly is IB and bravely took the challenge. Its a calm cool morning and I remembered I couldn't sleep the night before thinking of what I'm going to face the next day. I'm so anxiously nervous because I don't have friends from the same school. Yeah,alone. My first impression toward KMB was ," Mummy, this is so rural! with all the palm oils which our kampung also does not look like one ". Haha.. Its true right? And I think the worst thing for me on that day was to find out that the room is the same size as the store room back at our house and its a shared room. Okey, I know I sound like spoiled little kid being ungrateful. I felt like crying that time and my mum brought me to Alamanda and we did some last minute shopping and had our last meal together. When my parents about to leave I feel like I was left in a prison with no one that I know except for Farahin ( she's so quiet and it scares me,seriously! ) and my next-door-neighbor,Peanut which I knew her during PiSSA programme organised by Yayasan Pahang. And few of friends that I met and one of it beloved Jannah. Yes, I met her at the surau and I can still remember that moment clearly till now.

But now, after a year.. I love my small,sauna room.. It always make me feel as if I'm at home though I went back home almost every weekend without fail ( I told you! ). My room mate, Nur Farahin Ayob ; she's the first room mate after my sister and she's the best! She always listen to me talking craps everyday, with all sort of nonsense fairy tales of mine. Haha.. I LOVE YOU!! With all the spirit that she gave me, she always make my day and give me inspiration and the desire to keep moving in IB or else I don't think I can survive. My extended room mate, Asilah. Though she annoyed me a lot at first but I love her because she's a sincere person in expressing her thoughts and ideas. Love you too!

My classmates are all fantastic!! And we're together back this new year. They give me the biggest support of all especially in Maths. They are the best classmates that I ever have in my life ; caring, cheerful, forgiving, full of laughters, sincere and many more! Together we aim high and fly! =))

Teachers are great especially Pn. Khuzaimi.. Million thanks to her for constantly give me hope that I can actually do Maths and now I'm loving it. Thanks to her my grade increase by 2 points! I will remember her though she's not my teacher anymore. Yeah, the Year One deserves her because she's really a good teacher! =))

Lastly, KMB taught me a lot about ISLAM and UKHWAH. I can feel the strong bond between the sisters and among the Batch KITA members. We learn to trust and help each other. Whenever you break into tears, there's always someone that we can turn on. The biggest lesson that I learn here is I'm closer to ALLAH. Being here in KMB taking IB, it needs a lot of prayers and it is countless how many time I cried in solat regretting the fact that I'm an ungrateful abid. Oh,Allah please forgive me.. But I really feel that Allah is the one that help me a lot in going through all the tears . He gave me hope and I love HIM and ISLAM more than anything else in this world. Now I can see why Allah put me here in KMB because He loves me and want me to get closer to Him. Everything is so perfectly arranged.

Most important is, KMB bring me closer to my family. Our bond are getting stronger and stronger each and every day. I will at least call my parents once in every two days and sometime I'll call them almost every day. I love them!! Thank you Allah for everything. Thank you Allah..=))

p/s; I want to talk more about a year here in KMB but I couldn't do that. Sometimes, things are better left unsaid,right? Whatever it is, IB is one of the best moment in my life..=))

Week of Tears

2010-06-20T09:44:00.002+08:00

Firstly, I would like to wish my beloved father Happy Father's Day!! Though everyday should be a father's day but yes just find a special day to do so. Okey,craps..=.=

He's a great FATHER of mine, full of advices and always give me full support in everything. Thanks ayah for everything, from small u combed my hair like a boy and now I'm a grown up young lady you always give me support no matter how bad I performed in exams. Thanks Allah for blessing me with such a good father..May Allah bless you always my father and our family..Aminn..=)

Talking about examination..Hurmm.. Well,week of tears? All the results are out and alhamdulillah I did improved on the total points and some of the subjects like Chemistry,Maths and Business..Unfortunately, Biology disappoint me.. My result like so haihhhhhh,very low for me and I cried to Allah during Dhuha. I was so sad not because of the result only but when I saw Pn.Asima's face she looks so sad with our result. I'm really sorry teacher.. But when I pray,when I sujud to Allah I feel very close to him and I cried as if I'm talking to Him and said it loud in my heart and alhamdulillah I felt really calm and relieved. Suddenly I remembered the verses in Quran ;

"Boleh jadi kamu membenci sesuatu padahal ia amat baik bagimu, dan boleh jadi pula kamu menyukai sesuatu padahal ia amat buruk bagimu, Allah mengetahui sedang kamu tidak mengetahui " Al- Baqarah : 216

and also

"Jika Allah menolong kamu, maka tidak ada yang dapat mengalahkanmu tetapi jika Allah tidak membantumu, maka siapa yang dapat menolongmu setelah itu?Kerana itu, hendaklah kepada Allah sahaja orang-orang mukmin bertawakal." Ali-Imran:160

I extremely believe that Allah help me a lot!! Or else I don't think I can improve my grades and total points in the Sem2 exam. My mind suddenly blank for most of the papers and I was so sad and I remembered Pn.Norziah once told me if you lost,just recite Al-Insyirah and insya Allah,He will help you. Thank you, Allah!! Though maybe I have to say goodbye to UK for sure but guess Ireland and Australia will be my next choice. Semester 2 really taught me and bring me closer to Allah and I promise to myself that in everything I should purify my niat first and do it lillah-hitaala. everything for the sake of Allah and Islam.

A hectic week with Minggu Penghayatan Islam. I really love it!! Especially during the 6hours Ceramah Perbandingan Agama by Brother Lim(fyi,he's a muslim). And the "sudden war" last night and my first time experience to solat at the field it was really nice. So,bravo MPI team!! and I had so much fun with my team mates, Nusaibah!!!Go Ka'ab!! And the MPI also did help me to go through a week without my beloved friend,arwah Jannah. I miss her very-very much and I cried many times this week but thanks to MPI for distracting me from remembering her. Not that I don't want to remember her but I'm still in shock and I need time to recover and alhamdulillah I feel that I'm much better now because I know she's a great muslim and Allah will always bless her. I love you Jannah, very-very much.. We all love you.. You will always be in our heart till our death. Thanks for all the memories.. Thanks Allah for giving me the chance to know her,she's great and she really taught me a lot about Islam and bring me closer to you,THE ALMIGHTY.

2010-06-13T16:46:00.001+08:00

am going back to KMB.. Vacation to Langkawi was great,perhaps will update about it later but then I don't know when I'll have the time to do so.. Huhu..Yeah,Year 2-hectic life? Till then,takecare..=)

Ya Allah, tabahkanlah hatiku ini..

2010-06-03T21:16:00.004+08:00

Jannah Sani, ini untuk mu..

she was my good friend

she was my really good friend

i remembered

she's the first one to say hye to me

when i have no one in kmb since i'm alone with no friends

jannah cakap

"awak,datanglah rumah kita nanti dekat baling..rumah kita banyak pokok buah"

but i guess i'll come to your house without you

almost ever weekend i went back home

everytime..

jannah suka donut alien big apple

and that everytime..

i will buy it for her

and everytime i get her alien

she will be very happy

but

i will never see that again

i will never have the chance to buy alien

she was extremely a good friend of mine

she always full of advices

her knowledge in islam is very good

i adore her.very much..

but now

i don't know

whether i should use is or was

i really hope i still can use is

but

its meaningless

jannah

saya tahu Allah lebih sayangkan awak

saya tahu Allah lebih cintakan awak

Sebab tu Allah ambil awak dari kami semua

Kami semua yang sangat sedih

Kami semua yang sangat sayangkan awak

Kami semua yang kehilangan seorang dai

Kami semua yang kehilangan seorang doktor yang hebat

Lepas ni..

Tiada lagi orang

Untuk saya dan Farah

Bebelkan supaya tiada virus tidur dibawa masuk ke bilik

Untuk kami berdua

Gelakkan cita-citamu untuk ke overseas walaupun ke India

Untuk kami berdua

Argh..saya kehilangan kata-kata

Saya ingat lagi bila awak main-main dengan saya

Awak cakap awak nak kenalkan sepupu awak dekat abang saya

Sebab saya cakap saya tak sabar nak dapat akak ipar dan anak saudara

Tapi nampaknya

Awak tak sempat nak kenalkan kat saya apatah lagi abang saya

Saya ingat lagi sehari sebelum kita balik cuti semester hari tuh

Awak cakap awak pergi rumah kawan awak

Saya tanya awak tak nak balik ke?

Tiba-tiba awak cakap awak rasa nak balik rumah lambat

Awak rasa macam jauh

Tapi saya buat tak endah je

Saya tak sangka itu tandanya awak nak pergi tinggalkan kami semua

Tinggalkan kami semua buat selamanya

Tinggalkan kami dengan suatu pesan

Tinggalkan kami dengan kesan yang sangat mendalam

Tinggalkan kami dengan suatu pengajaran

Ajal itu pasti datang menjemput kita tanpa kita sedari

Kerana ajal itu suatu yang telah ditetapkan

Dan tidak mampu diubah

Saya tersentak

Saya sibuk mengejar IB, UK, doctor dan segala bentuk duniawi

Tapi saya tak pernah terfikir yang

Saya mungkin tak sempat pun untuk semua itu

Jannah..

Tenanglah kamu di sana..

Semoga Allah mencucuri rohmu jannah..

Semoga kamu bersama para solehah,jannah..

Kami pasti akan senantiasa mendoakan kamu jannah..

Kami sayang dan cinta kamu sehayat kami..

Semangat dan iltizam mu akan sentiasa ada dalam jiwa kami..

Al-fatihah ku sedekahkan buatmu

Wahai teman..=((

Life

2010-06-02T16:02:00.007+08:00

CAS session was fantastic and I didn't face any difficulty to mix around with them maybe because I'm used to it,thanks to my external CAS session. Hehe.. The kids are fantastic and they know how to wash dish, brush their own teeth and to eat using spoon without any leftover on the table. Wow,for me that is fantastic you know! Its not easy to train them up to that level, so well done to the teachers! There's one little chinese girl there which I don't know but yet to know her name perhaps tomorrow. I played my childhood rhyme with her ; you know this one

" Round,round the garden like a teddy bear. One step... Two step.. Tickle you underneath,yeay! "

Well, its sounds like that where you actually make a circle on her palm and start crawling on her hand then you tickle her. Hehe.. Its really, urgh I don't know how to describe the feeling but when I saw she giggles happily and her smiles is very wow,heartbreaking it really touch me. Simple thing I did but I can create a smile on her face and it really made my day. And what surprised me is that, she apparently did the same back to me and tickle me every time she had the chance and she will quickly hide or pretend like she did nothing the moment I turned back. Haha, cute girl. Very cute. See, I told you, they are not that bad. They are normal just like us so-call normal people.

I talked to a guy named Mohamad Shahril or known as Mamat ; he's disabled too but I don't really know about his disease and he's 25 years old. He's a good companion for talking I guess and he have a facebook! Hehe, I'll add him later on. When I was relaxing after I cleaned the kitchen he suddenly ask me ;

"Awak, kenapa awak nak buat kerja ni? Tak takut ke? Tak geli ke? "

I was like, eh? and I replied

"Geli dengan apa? "

"Yelah,kami kan OKU. Semua orang tak suka kami. "

" Eh, manada geli. Suka je tengok korang semua ni. Kenapa cakap camtuh? "

"Baguslah awak. Selalunya orang umur awak semua tak hirau kami. Macamlah kami ni hantu. Padahal kami pun manusia ciptaan Allah. Apa salah kami? "

I couldn't reply it. I just smiled and kept silent for a while. After a minute, I said to him ;

"Kamu semua tak ada salah apa. Diorang yang tak bersyukur atas nikmat yang Allah berikan. Jangan rasa sedih, Allah jadikan kamu istimewa sebab Allah sayang kamu "

"Allah sayang kita kan? "

"Ya..Dan yakinlah "

Long pause. I think back, oh Allah. Am I a good abid all this while ? Have I been grateful for everything that you give me from the moment I was as little as zygote? Please forgive me if ever I had been ungrateful for any nikmat from you. Thank you Allah for everything..=)

"Dan dia telah memberikan kepadamu segala apa yang kamu mohonkan kepadaNya. Dan jika kamu menghitung nikmat Allah nescaya kamu tidak akan mampu menghitungnya. Sungguh,manusia itu sangat zalim dan sangat mengingkari nikmat Allah "

Ibrahim ; 34

p/s : can't wait for tomorrow! another new experience perhaps,wee!

Its June

2010-06-01T21:03:00.002+08:00

Alright,its june already. Well,yeah and a week of holiday just passed without me doing anything. Puff,great! But I did finish writing up my personal statement that is important for my interview of course but I have to get my brother to check it because I feel that the essay somehow sounds childish and immature. Haha,blame the holiday. Tomorrow I'm going to start my day by doing CAS at PDK Tunas Sri Teruntum, Kuantan. Yeah,I love PDK ; from PDK Kajang then to PDK Telok Panglima Garang and then moving on to PDK Kuantan. Why? Out of hospital, school or anything I choose PDK? Well, I think I can tolerate with them more than those normal people who are mostly mean and ungrateful especially at the hospital. Some people way too impatient when they are waiting for treatment where they already knew that the hospital is full of patients and the doctors are not robot where they can entertain many patients at one time. And I totally agree with some opinion saying that doctors in Malaysia are not treated in the way they deserve to be. Well,enough of that bubbling since I'm going to be a doctor in Malaysia in the future as well. So,stop complaining Khadijah. Back to the PDK stuff, I think the children though they are down syndrome, suffering from autism or even cerebral palsy but I can see they are unique in their own way. I strongly believe that everyone have the same chance and so called "luck" but different ability and its up to us on how can we treasure it. And I really dislike the mentality of some people in the community that treat disabled people as if they were so disgusting,scary and alien-like. They should think that they also have the possibility for any of their family members or even themselves to become disabled and they should be grateful for what they have now, perfect. Hurmm, but still its hard to eliminate such mentality like what people said ; bad habit die hard. Yes,absolutely. But if we have a strong will to change it, it will change. But anyway I still excited to go for CAS tomorrow though I'm quite nervous. Yeah, its the same feeling every time I want to go to PDK, I just don't know the reason why. Till then, jae nae~

"Dan dialah yang menjadikan kamu sebagai khalifah-khalifah di bumi dan Dia mengangkat ( darjat ) sebahagian kamu di atas yang lain, untuk mengujimu atas kurnia yang diberikanNya kepadamu. Sesungguhnya Tuhanmu sangat cepat memberi hukuman dan sungguh, Dia Maha Pengampun, Maha Penyayang"

Al-An`am;165

p/s: I think I had lost my touch of cooking because I have not been cooking since I entered MCB. I can't even make a perfect telur mata.. Haiyoohhh..=.="

Allahuakbar!

2010-05-31T13:42:00.002+08:00

I'm sure my friends out there knows about the Lifeline 4 Gaza; Break The Siege mission right? The latest news stated that 10 were killed after being attacked by Israeli commandos and they brought the ship to unstated place. When i first read the headline, I was so sad. Their mission brings peace, they want to deliver all the aid for Gaza who had been under Israel for years and since that they never have the chance to develop their country as Israel have been putting a lot of barrier and pressure to them. Israel claim that the ships does not bring all the aid stuff but they are delivering other things to Gaza that maybe for the Israeli it might be any weapon that can fight Israel back. I was like oh come on, the Gaza people cannot do anything. Just let them have all the necessary things ; medicine and treatment plus food that they deserve. I really hope that the mission will be accomplished and the Gaza people will get what they deserve. Indeed on the other side, I'm sad because I could not do anything to help them but I can only pray for them. I know Allah will always protect them and the bad will get their punishment. Its just the matter of time. I don't know where's the humanity that the great people in the whole world are talking about all this while? I just couldn't find it in any. They are just commoners, with no weapon, in hunger, in despair. Why can't they understand that. I know I just cannot do anything about this. What can I do now is memantapkan aqidah dan pegangan terhadap Islam, belajar rajin-rajin , memimpin diri sendiri dengan jayanya and then only insya allah menjadi dai dan abid yang akan memperjuangkan agama Islam itu. Insya allah!

kepada pejuang-pejuang misi Lifeline 4 Gaza ;

"wahai nabi Muhammad, kobarkanlah para semangat mukmin untuk berperang. Jika ada dua puluh orang yang sabar di antara kamu, nescaya mereka dapat mengalahkan dua ratus orang musuh. dan jika ada seratus orang yang sabar di antara kamu, nescaya mereka dapat mengalahkan seribu orang kafir. Kerana orang-orang kafir itu adalah kaum yang tidak mengerti "

Al-ANFAL ; ayat 65

Insya allah, yakinlah dengan kekuasaanNya dan kemenangan itu akan jadi milik kita. Amin~

highlander

2010-05-30T21:22:00.003+08:00

white hair

ouch! its hurt!

mighty yellow

sweet pink

fried ice cream+whipped cream+strawberry=yummy!

pitcher plant with fly inside it.dead.

wee,bloom!

off white rose

peach colored rose

M09P-After A Year

2010-05-30T19:45:00.004+08:00

Well,let see.. Since everyone has posted about a year in MCB but I'll leave that post for the real day of a year in MCB which will be this coming 23rd June aite. I did post about my classmates, what I really think about them about a month after we had been in the same class. Surprisingly,what a fantastic year we had been through together. I can never imagine we actually manage to go through all the experiences, bad and sweet memoirs together because I never thought that we actually gonna work together,yeah different people,different emotions, different ego. Conflicts arise, arguments, laughters, frustration, annoyed and so all those different elements that i had been experiencing. Thanks guy, you really color and beautify my days in MCB. And most of all thanks to Allah for blessing me with such wonderful friends and classmates.

So,let's see if my first perception changed after a year?

Lets start with the girls I guess..hee

Aan - she is such a great friend. Always there whenever we are in need. I love her mum! Haha..otai giler and sporting. She is our Princess Diana, though she's sometimes well most of the times quite blurr but yet when you tell her something she will definitely listen to you though you might be annoyed with her sleepy face.. hehe..love you aan!

Umi - She have the greatest patience in class! I learned a lot from her about that. How we should accept things, ignore what people said no matter how it hurts you a lot and to think positive. She's a good sister and she can talk to her mother as if her mother is her buddy. I really envy that!

Suraya - She changed a lot. Positively. I adore her, her spirit in dakwah. Her spirit to become a da'ei. Her spirit to fight for Islam!

Dayana - She is the one who really change my first perception towards her. Usually my first perception always right but it turned out to be the other way round. She is so warm, caring and full of ideas. She's not some kind of young lady who is bold and arrogant. She's so nice. Very nice. Enough said.

Ainah - I heart you!! You have change a lot,my dear ( okey,ini euww dan over expressive..hehe ). Great friend. My jog mate sometimes..hehe..=)

Syu - Behind her happy and slumber face actually there's many stories of her life hidden and yet she still can overcome and pretend like nothing happen. I adore her spirit in giving the best in everything and I learned a lot from syu especially when it comes to educational things. Love her very much.

Arvenia - my perception towards her never change. Happy go lucky,semangat and yeah a lot more to describe. Hehe..enough said..=D

Adibah - Her mystery part revealed. She's not what we really thought. She's very protective I would say.

Adnin - my go-to-airport-by-bus mate. Hehehe.. Yes, we did share a lot of stories together and though she looked small and shy but hey,she's loud and do voice out! Its just the matter of time. Go,mee goreng!

Aisyah - Caring. Pious. Protective. Blurr. Full of advices. Trust me. =)

Haziyah - Lastly, a friend that I love most. Full of emotions but its hard for us to get close to her because she likes to keep it to herself whenever she have problems. Other than that,she's a very good friend! =D

The boys..Hurmm.. My perception towards them changed a lot. Well, I would say most of it went the other way round. But I'm not going to elaborate more about them because I don't really and I don't want to know them more detail.

Such a long post lah.. I'll update later about my short vacation that day.. With images perhaps.. Wee..=D

2010-05-22T20:15:00.002+08:00

Hurmm..

Suddenly I cried..

I couldn't find the reason why..

But tears just, i don't know..

Flow down my cheek just like that..

Suddenly I realised..

How lucky I am..

I feel that I am really the chosen one..

All this while in my life..

I was so far away from Allah..

From Islam..

From everything..

I was carried away..

Never care..

What is our sirah..

What is our religion really about..

Thanks to Allah..

Placed me in dearest KMB..

Taught me about Islam..

Taught me about effort..

Taught me about tawakal..

Taught me about friendship

Family

Ukhwah

Dearest girlfriends

Suddenly I miss my M09Pians-the girls

Though we just met yesterday

Stressed by our last paper

That was really a killer

But I was amazed

I was touched

I was comforted

By all of you

Your spirit

Keep smiling

And said that we did our best

Yes,we did and all we have is Allah

Let Allah decide what is the best for us

I love you guys

I love Allah

Because He is such a Great Creator

He gathered us in one place

To learn about each other

To cry together

To smile together

And most of all

To know more about Islam

Like what Suraya said

May Allah give us the strength

To work harder

And we'll meet

One day

Syurga Firdausi

Insya Allah

Korang!

Aku rindu sangat kat korang!

Have a great holiday with family..

Gonna miss all of you! =))

Erk..Hmm..Hmm

2010-05-14T15:54:00.002+08:00

Walaupun dah nak exam lagi 2 hari, saya nak cerita jugak. Kisahnya camnih, semalam sepatutnya ada meeting GNCC di surau besar walaupun akhirnya tak jadi sebab ada beberapa salah faham dengan mesej daripada pihak muslimin. Tapi itu bukan ceritanya, sementara nak tunggu "mesyuarat" tu, saya beli teh o ais limau di food court. Bungkus.

Dengan gembiranya bawa air tu masuk surau dan minumlah dengan Sherina, rakan usrah tercinta. Hehe.. Nak dijadikan cerita, lepas dah syok-syok minum dah tinggal separuh pun..

"Eh,KD ape tuh dalam air ni?"

"Hmm,kulit limau je kot..Biasalah tuh.." ( muka tak boleh blaa,terus minum sebab dahaga sgt )

TIba-tiba rasa macam tersekat-sekat dekat straw. Maka berhentilah minum

"Erk..Sherina "

"Erk,KD "

"Haiyoohh..ini sangat memusykilkan dan euwwww.."

Disebabkan itu, kami pun pergilah foodcourt dan tukar air tuh..

Persoalannya ; Korang agak-agak apa yang ada dalam air tuh sampai kami tak lalu nak teruskan minum? Walaupun air dah tinggal separuh...jeng.jeng.jeng.

cicak?

lipas?

ada yang kata berudu? (ini tak faham kenapa berudu...hmm..hmm)

getah?

dalam air tuh,ada kertas order tulis TOAL ( teh o ais limau ). hurmm..now i know what it mean by minum ilmu..=p

but still,its euwwiee

2010-05-10T15:09:00.002+08:00

I really need inspiration and motivation now

I can break into tears in anytime

Oh, Allah please help me..

Please strengthen my heart..

Please guide me...

Please..Please..Please..

photoshooting day out with my brother..=)

2010-05-09T16:34:00.002+08:00

alone

hardworking

hop for hope

beautiful

Love such outing,photo shoot the nature beauty of Allah creation. Subhanallah,everything is so perfect and so beautiful..=)

Banyaknya soalan!

2010-05-08T19:04:00.004+08:00

Kita selalu bertanya dan Al-Quran selalu menjawab..

KITA BERTANYA : KENAPA AKU DIUJI?
QURAN MENJAWAB
"Apakah manusia itu mengira bahawa mereka dibiarkan saja mengatakan; "Kami telah beriman," ("I am full of faith to Allah") sedangkan mereka tidak diuji? Dan sesungguhnya Kami telah menguji org2 yg sebelum mereka, maka sesungguhnya Allah mengetahui org2 yg benar dan, sesungguhnya Dia mengetahui org2 yg dusta."
-Surah Al-Ankabut ayat 2-3

KITA BERTANYA : KENAPA AKU TAK DAPAT APA YG AKU IDAM-IDAMKAN?
QURAN MENJAWAB
"Boleh jadi kamu membenci sesua tu padahal ia amat baik bagimu, dan boleh jadi pula kamu menyukai sesuatu, padahal ia amat buruk bagimu, Allah mengetahui sedang kamu tidak mengetahui."
- Surah Al-Baqarah ayat 216

KITA BERTANYA : KENAPA UJIAN SEBERAT INI?
QURAN MENJAWAB
"Allah tidak membebani seseorang itu melainkan sesuai dengan kesanggupannya."
- Surah Al-Baqarah ayat 286

KITA BERTANYA : KENAPA RASA FRUST?
QURAN MENJAWAB
"Jgnlah kamu bersikap lemah, dan jgnlah pula kamu bersedih hati, padahal kamulah org2 yg paling tinggi darjatnya, jika kamu org2 yg beriman."
- Surah Al-Imran ayat 139

KITA BERTANYA : BAGAIMANA HARUS AKU MENGHADAPINYA?
QURAN MENJAWAB
"Wahai orang-orang yang beriman! Bersabarlah kamu (menghadapi segala kesukaran dalam mengerjakan perkara-perkara yang berkebajikan), dan kuatkanlah kesabaran kamu lebih daripada kesabaran musuh, di medan perjuangan), dan bersedialah (dengan kekuatan pertahanan di daerah-daerah sempadan) serta bertaqwalah (be fearfull of Allah The Almighty) kamu kepada Allah supaya, kamu berjaya (mencapai kemenangan)."

KITA BERTANYA : BAGAIMANA HARUS AKU MENGHADAPINYA?
QURAN MENJAWAB
"Dan mintalah pertolongan (kepada Allah) dengan jalan sabar dan mengerjakan sembahyang; dan sesungguhnya sembahyang itu amatlah berat kecuali kepada orang-orang yang khusyuk"
- Surah Al-Baqarah ayat 45

KITA BERTANYA : APA YANG AKU DAPAT DRPD SEMUA INI?
QURAN MENJAWAB
"Sesungguhnya Allah telah membeli dari org2 mu'min, diri, harta mereka dengan memberikan syurga utk mereka... ?
- Surah At-Taubah ayat 111

KITA BERTANYA : KEPADA SIAPA AKU BERHARAP?
QURAN MENJAWAB
"Cukuplah Allah bagiku, tidak ada Tuhan selain dari Nya. Hanya kepadaNya aku bertawakkal."
- Surah At-Taubah ayat 129

KITA BERKATA : AKU TAK DAPAT TAHAN!!!
QURAN MENJAWAB
"... ..dan jgnlah kamu berputus asa dr rahmat Allah. Sesungguhnya tiada berputus asa dr rahmat Allah melainkan kaum yg kafir."
- Surah Yusuf ayat 12

kita suka ayat-ayat nih..thanks to my beloved friend, Sakinah Hassan..Kita copy dari blog dia..An inspirational post I would say..=)

Patience

2010-05-07T19:26:00.004+08:00

"No reason have we why we should not put our trust on Allah. Indeed He Has guided us to the Ways we (follow). We shall certainly bear with patience all the hurt you may cause us. For those who put their trust should put their trust on Allah." (Ibrahim:12)

To be patient is not easy, though being here in KMB taught me so many things about patience and alhamdulillah I managed to improve a bit on it. Back then, I'm a hot head person no doubt. Ask any of my friends especially the prefect gang they will agree with that. But being here alone in KMB without any former schoolmate except for Atiqah which I would say that I'm not that close to her anymore like we were before, I put a starting point for me to turn over a new leaf being a new me. Patient one.

But I guess, Allah The Greatest of all, he knows everything and under certain circumstances He would like to test his hamba. Its hard, its really difficult to control your temper especially when it deals with your classmates, friends and your surrounding. But when you can overcome it, eventually you will smile VERY BIG as you are very proud of yourself. Like for certain things which I can never imagine before that I could actually handle with it :

stupid JPAM camp - though i'm in KPA before ever since form 1 but been there really-REALLY test my patience. espc on the tudung issue plus that golek-golek atas jalan tar like what.
hot-tempered friends ~ previously i will talk back cause for me fire must fight back with fire instead of water or any other element. But now I think somehow I can pujuk myself and said that I was like that before so I should give room for others to improve not discouraging them.
having a crush (awk,sori utk point ini) ~ haha, i know its sounds lame and illogical in some sense but then this really need patience cuz its not easy to eliminate that feeling. This deals with penyakit hati, I should practice that cinta Allah itu melebihi segala-galanya but then still can't help it. But yeay,alhamdulillah I'm eliminating that feeling bit by bit and I'm really happy with it. Cuz I believe Allah will always give me the best so I don't have to worry about all the jodoh stuff and just focus and concentrate on my study. Like what Kak Alaq said, kita jangan menjadi fitnah kepada agama kita..tsk..tsk
stay up till 4 in the morning for Biology/Chemistry/Maths. This is so unbelievable..may this gonna be my habit..=p
Love MATHS and CHEMISTRY with all of my heart. Yes,I did it! I managed to love these two killing subjects and I'm now passionate of doing assignment on these subjects everyday..Hehehe..=D

That's just few bout it that I can highlighted that somehow significant to me. Lastly, I leave you all with this beautiful verse from Allah that we should ponder about.

Not so do those who show patience and constancy, and work righteousness; for them is forgiveness (of sins) and a great reward. (Hud:11)

To my fellow friends, yes exam is just around the corner but let not make it a reason for us to feel stressed out. Remember Allah is always by your side. Believe in Allah, believe in yourself, insya Allah there's victory in the end of the day. Allah knows what the best for us. Believe in that..=))

Love you guys always!

p/s; specially dedicated to Kak Alaq,Kak Athirah,Kak Jihah and my fellow seniors. Good luck for the IB examination!

I Believe in ALLAH, I Believe 45, I Believe I can FLY

another p/s: please pray for my success this coming exam. please pray for the health of my body, mind , soul and the most important is my iman.

Oh Allah,please give me the strength to face this challenge..Aminn

saya dah nak exam

2010-04-28T01:51:00.000+08:00

wahh,takkan update blog buat seketika..bye2

2010-03-25T17:16:00.002+08:00

This week is quite tiring and blended with emotions. Haha.. We had our Business Day last Tuesday and our class was involved in the Sales Carnival. The sales,alhamdulillah and we managed to get net profit of RM280++ roughly!!! Like so excited to have such a huge amount of money since the selling period only for two hours and we managed to make such a great profit. Thanks to the girls in my class and some of the boys who helped a lot throughout the selling process even though we didn't win any category but then we managed to make a lot of profit compared to the winning classes. So,guys we don't have to feel bad about it.. Everyone get emotional about our Group4 Science project, there's bit of misunderstanding between the boys and the girls which I don't wanna to tell more about it.. More or less I just hope that this thing can be done quickly and smoothly regardless all the misunderstanding that occur. Its almost April already and next weekend I'm going to Malacca for Theory Of Knowledge Camp!! I'm so excited about it, Ainah and Haziyah will be going also so I think the camp will turn out to be awesome perhaps. Tomorrow I'm going back to my house in KL since my room mate , Farah and her classmates conduct a motivation camp in Putrajaya so I don't want to stay alone in my cute room.. Haha,its just a reason,. The real fact is that I want to watch How To Train Your Dragon and Alice In The Wonderland. Call me childish but that's who I am,okey. There's nothing wrong in watching cartoon or fantasy movies right? Owh, I can't wait for 23rd of April my whole classmates will be going to Kuantan!! But then I have to think about the transportation matters fast.. Oh,help me! I have to keyboard-off ( is this word exist? hehe ) since I have frisbee training.

Btw, my team (BPGR) won the netball competition yesterday! we won throughout the league except one game seri..xpelah,we did our best..Chaiyok B,P,G,R!!

Cita-cita

2010-03-17T20:50:00.002+08:00

"Adik, dah besar nak jadi apa?"

"Murid-murid,nanti jangan lupa tulis nak jadi apa dekat ruang cita-cita"

"Dah dapat result SPM nih,dah fikir nak jadi apa? "

Hurmm,itulah soalan dari kecik sampailah sekarang pun. Tapi sekarang tak lah ramai sangat tanya sebab ramai dah tau anak En. Ariff & Pn. Zainun nih tengah wat IB-Medic.. Tapi kalau fikir-fikir balik kan, dari kecik tak pernah konsisten nak jadi apa.. Ingat lagi dulu nak jadi askar lah,bomba lah,polis lah.. Benda tuh macam tak tercapai dek akal pun kalau ikut situasi sekarang kan? Lagi kelakar dulu excited nak jadi wartawan sebab tengok siapa entah tak ingat nama wartawan majalah 3 tuh.. Aa,Norzalina Redzuan! Eh,yeke? Betul lah kot.. Nak jadi wartawan sebab nak berjalan merata-rata tempat.. Boleh terima tak? Hehehe.. Pastuh pernah satu ketika berangan nak jadi Gabenor Bank Negara macam Tan Sri Zetty Akhtar sebab boleh sign dekat duit Malaysia.. Haha,tuh lagi lah kelakar kan? Pastuh nak jadi nutritionist lah apelah.. Almost setiap tuhang ruang cita-cita kat rekod buku pelajar tuh akan tukar. Sampailah form five, barulah tulis nak jadi doktor dan insya allah itulah pilihan hatiku.. Ececeyh,aminn.. Tapi tiap kali balik cuti sem, ayah mesti tanya " Betul ke nak jadi doktor nih ? ". Mungkin ayah tak percaya kot anak dia nih tak pernah cakap pun nak jadi doktor tetibe nak jadi. Mummy pun camtuh selalu jugak tanya. Mungkin sebab anak dia nih cam playful giler kan, bukan bookworm.. Hehe.. Tapi kalau tanya saya pun nape nak jadi doktor? Hmm.. ni jawapan saya masa interview mara dulu..ikhlas dari hati barangkali ;

"Kenapa awak nak jadi doktor? Kerjanye dahlah leceh gaji pun sikit. " provokasi oleh puan penemuduga yang baik..=))

"Sebenarnya saya pun tak tahulah.. Tapi saya nak jadi doktor sebab saya ingat masa saya pergi Indonesia.. Penduduknya ada yang sangat miskin dan tak mampu nak pergi hospital. Pergi hospital pun kena berbayar semua..Saya nak jadi doktor supaya saya boleh bagi bantuan kat orang-orang Malaysia,terutama yang miskin dan tak berkemampuan macam kat pedalaman semua nih. Pastuh saya teringin nak pergi misi kemanusiaan semua,tolong mana yang mampu dan the only way yang saya nampak ialah dengan menjadi doktor. "

Hurmm..harapnya saya diberi kekuatan oleh Allah s.w.t untuk meneruskan cita-cita murni ini untuk menjadi doktor muslimah yang berjaya.. Aminn... =))

Congrats!

2010-03-14T20:53:00.002+08:00

Yeah,the SPM '09 result was out last thursday and my school managed to get a pointer of 1.8 and third place in Pahang which is VERY GOOD for a daily school. Hope our school can get the title Sekolah Berprestasi Tinggi soon!! Insya allah.. Yes,congrats to the teachers especially and all my juniors that had made such a GREAT JOB! So,my super junior this is your challenge!

Enough about that, so I think my juniors are busy about all the scholarships things and quite a number of them that asked me about those things and yes I'm free to answer any of those questions cuz I'm free from KMB for a week. So,you guys can add me up at ym ; khadijah_ariff.. Feel free to ask any questions regarding upu,scholarships,matrix,courses and insya allah I'll try to help you out in giving advices but not in deciding for you okey?

By the way here some tips ;

always ask yourself this questions

what i actually wanna do?
what is my interest?
do this thing gonna secure me a job in the future?
can i pay back the loan? ( if you are considering mara n ptptn of course )
do my parents support me in this thing?
can i really do it?
why i wanna go overseas?? ( this is like a major question for those that have the interest )

Actually,frankly if u ask me why i am here in KMB i don't have a definite answer for you. Yes, at the beginning I really wanna go somewhere in UK or Australia doing medicine and still to this moment. However, along the road in achieving that while in KMB I always think why I actually people want to go overseas?As we can see universities in Malaysia are moving towards the world class status etc also right. So, I think the answer is the different environment and culture plus the snowy things, branded items perhaps? Take beautiful pictures ( thats for my case ), adventures etc...

I'm saying this not because I want to give up IB ke ape,ko gile ke..Hahaha,tak lah cuma kadang terfikir juga, saya nak pergi overseas sebab ape? Tapi saya memang nak pergi,ayah bagi ke xbagi ke nak pergi jugak.. Oops,tak lah kalau ayah,ibu,atok,tok ki,atok mak,nenek ke ape sme tak bagi tak pergi jugak.. Sobsobsob.. tapi saya suka IB dan KMB semestinya sebab ianya mencabar keimanan saya sampai boleh stress tahap jerawat membiak dgn jayanya dan kadar pemakanan telah tunggang terbalik.. Oh,saya rasa saya sangat comot sekali.. Tapi walaupun benda nih challenging tapi saya hidup dengan happy go lucky setiap hari dan menganggap masalah bukan satu masalah sebab lagi kita fikir ianya ialah masalah lagi pening kepala. Jadi kat KMB saya ialah insan yang banyak positif ion di sekililing saya tak seperti kat SMART dulu dan kat sini jugak saya lebih cinta rasulullah dan Allah plus Islam semestinya. Percayalah, bila kita rasa kita susah,sesak,rasa nak bunuh diri,stress tahap gaban ke ape kan tapi bila kita ambil wudhuk,solat dan membaca ayat2 Allah yang kita anggap macam ditujukan kepada kita ( sila gantikan wahai muhammad dengan nama sendiri untuk lebih rasa best..sy wat camtuhlah ) rasa cam tenang sangat,rasa Allah itu akan mempermudahkan segala urusan kita dan ya saya banyak mengalami keajaiban itu..

Ya,adik-adik saya telah membebel panjang lebar mengenai perkara yang tidak berkaitan. Kesimpulannya, fikirlah elok2 ye peluang tuh datang sekali je dan yang pasti perlu diiringi dengan usaha, doa dan tawakal. Selamat berjaya menjadi "manusia".=)))

Hurmm

2010-03-08T16:36:00.002+08:00

Hectic week

Mild asthmatic attack

Stress perhaps?

And not enough rest

Oh,Allah

Please give me the strength

Please give me the health

Thanks Allah

2010-03-07T19:10:00.001+08:00

Tiring but satisfied.

PiBians rock!